Jealousy

There are two types of ways someone can make you jealous: you like someone who is in a relationship already, or someone is having a better life or more success than you. Maybe there might be more than two but let's face it, these are the main ones that are talked about in our daily life. So, why don't I talk about it in my point of view?

Jealousy in relationships is the most common state of all jealousies. I might also add this type of jealousy: when you're in a relationship with someone and your significant partner is looking at someone else. While that's happening, you overthink it all in a flash and conclude that your partner thinks that you are not pretty, worth it, cool and thinking why she/he would ever date you. Well, stop it! These little fantasies are downright unnecessary. Do you feel like your partner doesn't think your all of those things anymore? Then just talk about it with her/him. There's no need to make a movie up in your head to stir up drama and make the relationship difficult. It's one of the reasons why some people can't even be in a relationship for at least a month. Another one that is pretty common is: when your suspecting your partner is cheating on you. Oh my god, how in the world do you deal with this? Um...by talking with your partner? I had to give it a sarcastic tone because it's as simple as washing the dishes. I think it's funny how people prefer to scream at each other while every neighbor hears the conversation, than to just talk about it like adults. No, we have to get physical to prove who the real man/woman is. If you are the one who was cheated on, don't go looking for the person your partner cheated with. Don't go searching for him/her for a fight or to cause any problems. You don't know who you are dealing with or getting yourself into. So, don't go to the person who didn't even commit the infidelity. You go straight to your partner, talk about it and decide wether to leave or give the cheater (oops...sorry, the partner) a second chance. The obvious choice is to leave your partner. If your lover cheated on you with a single man/woman, it's your partners fault. Now, if both had significant partners, then it's both their fault. The best decision is to leave that person and move on because you deserve better. You deserve someone who will love you for your imperfections and the great qualities you have. Yes, even if your partner screams at you and doesn't like you to be with other people, get away from him/her. It baffles me that people forgive idiots like that. Every relationship needs some space. Does he/she say he's/she's really changed? Probably, but trust me...they will be the same idiotic, abusive person they were 2 weeks ago. There's never a change, only a transformation.

Going back to the main type of jealousy, everyone hates when that special someone of yours likes somebody else. It makes you feel ugly, like your not good enough for that special someone. It could be also caused by a rare case in which that person is flirting with you for weeks and you feel like he/she might be the one. But, she then says the worst words..."I'm talking with someone". Then you realize it was all a fun, little joke. Except the joke is on you, and it's not pretty. You then feel like the whole world around you thinks your ugly, worthless, not funny or just annoying to everyone. This is one of the worst cases because you then fall in this deep depression that is inescapable. Teenage suicides are horrible and they are caused by this negative effect that is spread around the mind of a once positive boy/girl with hopes and dreams. It might sound cheesy, but it's not. Hundreds of teens and adults commit suicide because they're convinced they will

never find love or someone who actually cares for them. Well...let's change the attitude. Sure, your crush might not like you because he/she is interested in someone else. What can be resolved? Just move on. I know it's not easy, but did that person really pay attention to you or even notice you? Did he/she really gave you the attention you gave him/her? Don't make a movie in your mind where you know that it's not going to happen. Cold truth? Yeah, but at least it's the truth. The truth is you deserve someone that will pay attention to you and then you'll give them attention so they know you're interested (just like they're interested in you). I rather have a person tell me the truth and cry, become frustrated or angry with myself for a few days and one day...let it go. It's better than have that person tell you lies after lies forever. Trust me, the truth helps. Yes, maybe that person did choose someone else instead of you. But what if the one chosen might be violent with her/him or just a really bad influence? While he/she is suffering or regretting from the partner they chose, you're feeling great and thinking "I would've made you happy, but that's what you get for not choosing the right one". Nothing feels better than payback, am I right? Girls and boys, don't go picking the one you like because they look good. Instead, look at who they are inside. Their skills, goals, intelligence, interest, opinions and emotions. No, sex does not count. You're not going to be in a relationship, your just going to be friends with benefits. Seriously, wait a while before doing things in bed with your partner. Relax and take it easy with your hormones kids.

Now, the jealousy of success. No matter where you com from, someone will always be jealous of your success. When you're winning, some people want to see you fail. Why? Because they're jealous that they don't have the recognition you have and they want to desperately steal it away from you. Well, you don't let that happen. Keep doing what your doing, even if they laugh at you. For example, I want to be an actor. It's a serious profession that I want to be in and I've had a very positive response from my performances in theatre. However, in my school, I do get positive response from teachers, students and friends. But some of the younger crowd don't take it serious and instead of shutting the hell up, they laugh like they're going to have the talent level that I have. Those are people who won't go anywhere with attitudes like that. So I laugh. That younger crowd that only wants to party won't ever understand my artistic mind and how much I love to be an actor. I say screw them, because they don't know anything. I will say this though, and with all honesty. I used to be the jealous type of someone having more success than me. For example, my first best friend would always get good grades in every class and when I compared mine to his, I would get mad. I always had in my head that moment that he would get a C+ or D and I would get an A+. Or, my second best friend who got in to Forensics and I didn't, despite the teacher saying I did a really good job. Seriously, he left unsure if he would get in and I was super positive that I was a shoe-in. It didn't happen and I started to make him feel like he didn't deserve it. Yes, I despised him because he was getting so many things in his life and I was left with nothing. He got picked in oratory, and in the competition he won in 1st place for the improvisation category. Above all, he found the love of his life. That's when I started to make myself feel like a piece of garbage and I treated him like nothing. I felt like a complete, douche and asshole for what I did. There goes my first curse word on here. It's true. I was disgusted with myself. I needed to grow up, and I did. I started to become more mature and really just congratulated both of my best friends for their achievements. What I did was unacceptable, especially with my second best friend. He helped me in so many things and I can't be more grateful for all the things he has done for me. I can't be more than happy for all he has achieved and for finding the one person he loves. I'm extremely happy for both of them, they will last forever and I know it. I'm proud of him, he's like a brother to me and I'm glad I worked out my issues. If I didn't, we wouldn't be the great friends that we are now. The jealousy I once had is gone, forever. That negativity that was eating me is gone. I'm free from it and because I was free from it, I got some achievements of my own that I never thought I would get for my acting. I'm thankful for every person in my life, especially my two best friends. They make me grow stronger. I don't know what I would without them. To finish, jealousy is a normal feeling that comes out from a human being. It's hard to control, but trust me...you can control it. I went through a lot to control it, and I can't be more grateful that I did.