Faded

FADE IN:

EXT. FIELD - NIGHT

Faded light stutters as sullen figures lull, incarcerating looming shadows in mocking doom.

Smiling, crying, twisted in agony, a man, barely a man, cringes at the end of a gun.

The pulling of a trigger, so sweet, so tantalizing, so scrumptiously inevitable, yet unbearably impossible.

The man, MILES, pulls down the pistol with a bitter disposition, pitying the pitiless in gruesome satisfaction.

EXT. STREET - NIGHT

Hooded, quiet, loathing, Miles walks towards a home of exuberant wealth, pausing, but not stopping, at the sight of flashing lights.

Red as blood, blue as black, officers linger, rolling tinted windows in reflective light.

TREVOR, an officer, passenger not driver, waves towards Miles.

TREVOR

Little late for a little mosey, don’t ya think?

Miles nods, neither slowing nor stopping.

TREVOR

Been some fussing bout some gunning of some not so innocent shootings as of late. Heard anything of it?

Miles pushes his hands deep into his pockets, walking with eyes on his feet.

TREVOR

Hey boy! I’m talking to you!

Miles continues.

TREVOR

Boy! Boy! Jesus Christ. Duke, stop the car.

DUKE stops the car.

Trevor steps out.

TREVOR

Boy! I’m warning you now. You best be stopping.

Miles doesn’t stop.

The thunder of a shot.

Miles stops.

TREVOR

Good. Now that I good and got your attention and such, I’d like to ask you a couple a questions regarding this here incident of yours.

MILES

Is that a threat?

TREVOR

Just asking to ask, is all.

MILES

Ask someone else.

Miles turns to go.

The officer cocks his gun.

TREVOR

I’m asking you boy.

Miles sighs, and turns back to the officer.

TREVOR

Good. Now go and get into that light over there where I can good and see ya and such. And take off that hood of yours too.

Miles sighs, steps into the halo of a street lamp, and takes off his hood.

TREVOR

Good. Now you’re getting it. Now lets get good and acquainted, shall we?

Miles shrugs.

TREVOR

I’m Trevor. You?

Miles mumbles.

TREVOR

Whats that boy?

MILES

Miles. I said Miles.

TREVOR

And how are you this evening, Miles?

MILES

I don’t want any trouble.

TREVOR

I’m not asking for any. Just how you’re doing is all.

MILES

Fine.

TREVOR

Good. Now that we’ve got that good and covered, lets get down to business, shall we?

Miles shrugs.

TREVOR

You from around these parts?

Miles nods.

TREVOR

Where?

MILES

Here.

TREVOR

Wheres here?

MILES

There.

Miles points to a house down the road and up the hill.

TREVOR

You know that place?

MILES

I live there.

TREVOR

In that house? Over there?

MILES

Yes.

The officer gives Miles a look over.

TREVOR

Is that so?

MILES

Thats what I said.

TREVOR

Then why not there? Why out here? Why go all the way out here to be all the way over there?

MILES

Couldn’t sleep.

TREVOR

No? Why not?

Miles shrugs.

TREVOR

Ain’t cus you was working, is ya?

MILES

I’m an artist.

TREVOR

Sure. Sure. Con’s are artists too.

MILES

I paint.

TREVOR

Sure. Sure. Cocaine and heroin too.

MILES

Look, if you’re just gonna shoot me why don’t you just go ahead and do it already.

TREVOR

Shoot you?! Me shoot you? Now why’d I go and do a thing like that? When I good and like you too. Real good. Why’d I go and do a thing like that?

Miles sighs.

MILES

Just do what you gotta so I can just go on with whatever’s gonna happen.

TREVOR

Such a hurry boy! Such a hurry! And why is that, boy-o? Why so timid? Why so fraid?

MILES

Forgive me for keeping my distance from a homicidal maniac.

TREVOR

Funny! Clever. Cus I’m a cop right? A murderer or something. A kkk affiliate I must be.

Miles shrugs.

MILES

Not my place to say.

TREVOR

Ah but you did! You do! Each and every one of you. And just like you niggers too. But thats alright. Thats okay. I can get well past that enough. I’m just doing my duty, is all. Is that so wrong?

MILES

If you’re a killer then I guess not.

TREVOR

Killer? Hardly! I’m just here on parole is all. Keeping the public safe and such.

MILES

And dead is safe?

TREVOR

Dead? No! Of course not. Never. Unless, of course, such a situation, as such, requires such. Which, of course, I can’t be much to blame for, can I?

MILES

Who then?

TREVOR

Why the criminal, of course.

MILES

Death doesn’t assume incrimination.

TREVOR

But what innocent escalates?

Miles shrugs.

MILES

Depends on your definition of escalation.

The officer gives a cold cackle.

TREVOR

Boy, you crack me up good! Now how about you and I go for a little ride?

MILES

On what grounds?

TREVOR

No grounds. Just a little drive is all. Thats alright. Ain’t it? An innocent little drive.

MILES

I’ll just walk, thanks. Have already.

TREVOR

Sure. Sure. And so close to home too. Say, since you’re going that way, and me too, why not just go just the same? Ya? Why not just have us along for a little long while.

MILES

Is that an offer or an order?

TREVOR

Don’t play stupid boy. You know what it is.

Miles sighs, turns, and begins to walk.

Trevor turns to Duke, whispers incoherent nonsense, and jogs to Miles.

INT. HOUSE - NIGHT

Miles fills clean glass with dirty fluid, exchanging a cold glare with a cruel captor.

TREVOR

Thank ya muchly.

Trevor takes a good long swill, grimacing.

TREVOR

Mighty fine place you got here. Had it long?

Miles nods absently.

TREVOR

Mind if I ask how?

MILES

Yes.

TREVOR

Well I ain’t asking.

MILES

Work.

TREVOR

Ya? What kind a work?

MILES

Painting.

TREVOR

Ya? Any good?

MILES

Good enough.

Trevor nods without listening.

TREVOR

So listen here boy-o, heres the thing. How does someone like you, someone of you’re, uhhh, stature, if you will, get a place like this, I mean, in a place like this, as such.

MILES

Money, mostly.

TREVOR

Funny, boy! Really. Truly. In all honesty boy. Funny. But the thing is boy-o, you see, the thing is, well, people like you, I mean, people of, uhh, errr, color, I mean, they don’t tend to much, mostly, get along with people like, well, this.

Miles shrugs.

MILES

Have so far.

TREVOR

Yes. Yes. Well. Thats the thing, you see. The thing is, see, these, people, uhhh, neighbors, of yours, well, they’ve been, as such, complaining, as of late, of, errr, hooded figures and the like, if you will.

Miles shrugs.

MILES

Sleeps never easy no more. Walking helps.

TREVOR

Yes. Yes. Well. The thing is, people have begun to grow a little, err, uhh, suspicious, if you will, with the way things, are, or, errr, with the way you are, at least, because, well, you know.

MILES

What?

TREVOR

Well, you know, cus, well, you’re different.

MILES

You mean black.

TREVOR

Yes. Well. To get to it then. Thats it mostly. It does lead to, well, you know, suspicion, and such, among the more, well, affluent, as such

Miles stands, downing his drink.

MILES

Is that all?

Trevor looks nervously down at the ground, clearly no longer in his domain.

TREVOR

Yes. Well. No. Not exactly. You see, well, the thing is, you see, things have been, well, said, as such, claims, if you will. Claims that require, well, you know, investigation, as such.

Miles sighs, pouring another drink, quickly growing drunk.

MILES

Of?

TREVOR

Well, lots of things, really. But mostly just dealing, mostly. Heroin and the like. You know how it is.

MILES

Do I?

Miles gives a menacing smile.

TREVOR

Yes, well. Better to just go and get to it then, yes? Right all out in the open. Better to just go and get to it.

MILES

With a warrant.

TREVOR

Well, ya see, the thing is, well, I was hoping, maybe, that might not be so necessary, as such.

MILES

Because you can’t.

TREVOR

Because it’d cause a lot of commotion.

MILES

For you.

TREVOR

And you too, surely. Might as well keep the unknown not known, yes?

Miles frowns, drinking the last of his whiskey.

MILES

I’m afraid not officer. I’m afraid even that indulgence has seen better days. Better to get a warrant if you want it, I can’t promise to go kindly without it. With it and I will, just as I came. Until then, though, I think you better go.

Miles nods towards the door, though not very kindly.

Trevor stands, agitated.

TREVOR

You playing it dumb, boy-o. They’s gonna catch you and they’s gonna get you good. You think you smart but you ain’t. You ain’t! They gonna get you and you goddamn well know it too.

MILES

Well, when they do, I’ll see to it to see you too.

Miles opens the front door.

MILES

Until then.

Trevor grumbles and marches out of the house.

EXT. POOL - NIGHT

With a false smirk, Miles floats atop a well lit pool, awaiting the inevitable in dull boredom.

Glaring at the stars, Miles sinks to the bottom, stars growing hazy in heavy water.

Lights begin to fade as water begins to fill.

Drowning.

Drowning.

Drowning.

Darkness encroaches upon fading light, a voice vaguely mumbling far beyond.

Louder.

Louder.

A splash of water.

Tangled limbs and fresh air.

Gasping.

Coughing.

Breathing.

Miles lays splattered across the brittle ground next to his closest friend ANDRE.

Andre moves to stand, patting Miles on the chest.

ANDRE

You good?

Miles nods breathlessly.

Andre grabs a towel, throwing one to Miles, who moves to sit near the pool.

Andre begins to dry himself, back to Miles, looking out into the woods, before hearing the distinct crash of a splash.

Again the two lay against the ground.

Miles moves to stand.

Another splash.

Andre sighs.

Miles appears, arms latched to gravel.

ANDRE

You’re a prick.

Miles smiles.

MILES

Could be worst.

ANDRE

Ya? How?

MILES

Could be dead.

ANDRE

I’d rather that.

Miles floats to the middle of the pool.

MILES

What do you think its like?

ANDRE

What?

MILES

Being dead.

ANDRE

It’s not like anything. You’re dead.

MILES

Well ya, sure, but...what about after?

ANDRE

Probably just nothing man.

MILES

There can’t just be nothing.

ANDRE

Why not?

MILES

There has to be something.

ANDRE

Why?

MILES

There can’t just be nothing after so much something.

ANDRE

Why not? Why can’t there be nothing? Why must there always be something? Why is everyone so convinced there has to be something?

MILES

Because thats depressing.

ANDRE

Of course its depressing. Its death.

MILES

But if all there is is nothing then why do all these people believe theres something? Not even some, most. Everybody basically. How can everybody just be wrong always?

ANDRE

Its not wrong. Its fear. Everyone knows nothings nothing in the end, its just fear that makes us hope and pray and pretend theres ever really something.

MILES

But what about visions and miracles and holy texts?

ANDRE

Man, forget that shit. Like thats ever been anything. Man, thats just make believe. Just something to make you believe.

MILES

But why? Why this big conspiracy? Why all this delusion?

ANDRE

Because life sucks man. Life is shit. This makes it seem like life’s not so bad after all in the end.

MILES

But what do you get out of it? Out of believing in nothing in the end.

ANDRE

Its not a belief man.

MILES

An opinion then.

ANDRE

More than anything.

MILES

And what proof do you have?

ANDRE

To prove the truth?

MILES

To prove your hypothesis.

Andre thinks for a moment.

ANDRE

Well its not so much proof as it is logic. Basic understanding.

MILES

So you’re using your surroundings to create a hypothesis based on your understanding.

ANDRE

Exactly.

MILES

Like a religion.

ANDRE

Nah man, its different.

MILES

Its not though, is it? None of it is. You atheists or whatever you wanna call yourself’s act like you’re better or smarter or whatever but the truth is, you’re all just the same, all just no different. All just trying to convert anyone and everyone to your half-baked idea of hope and religion. But what do you get out of it? Out of all this in the end? I mean, Christians I get. Muslims I get. Jews and Hindus I get too. Even Buddhists a bit. But atheists. You’re the real messed up religion. Believing in nothing as much as everyone else believes in something. Its oddly pessimistic. So pessimistic I almost don’t get it. I mean, what do you get out of all this, in the end?

ANDRE

The pleasure of knowing I’m right.

MILES

And what if you’re wrong? What if there is something, or anything, for that matter, after all this? And all you had to do was just simply believe?

ANDRE

What kind of messed up religion enforces faith upon the promise of eternal life?

MILES

Pretty much all of them mostly.

ANDRE

And what does that say about us, as a people, a culture? Forcing others to believe so they can just be arbitrarily saved. What kind of screwed up religion just sends anyone away for just being skeptical? If this god is all knowing and all powerful and all that, why doesn’t he do anything about it?

MILES

Because the choice must be our own. Our faith ours too.

ANDRE

And what kind of faith is that? Believing the unbelieved in fear of the unbelievable? Threatening vague threats in place of honest sympathy. Promising lasting flames to those who even wonder about questioning? Thats no free will. Thats no honest choice. Thats a threat. Thats intimidation. Because if you don’t do exactly what he wants when he wants then you’re as good as gone forever.

MILES

Then what do you think? If there is a God or whatever. What do you think he’s all about?

ANDRE

Well if there was, which there isn’t, I’d imagine there’d be at least some sort of sympathy, some sort of kindness. I mean, all these people talk about all his grace and goodness and all that and yet most won’t even let anyone unless they drown themselves pretty much, or at least do something for more than a little bit. And what kind of messed up god is into that? Not mine, man. If I ever had one. Which I don’t. But if I did, his would be just, you know, never banishing anyone anywhere forever. Eternity is just too damn long. Maybe a few weeks or years or something. But never forever. If forever really exists. Thats just plain stupid.

MILES

Well maybe thats something we can agree on. Something we can get along with. This whole idea of God just being just some petty bastard or whatever; it just never scratched me the right way, you know. This whole idea of I’m just gonna smite you or whatever. It just never made a whole lot of sense. I mean, if you’re so great and powerful and all that, why give us flaws? Why give us thought? Why let us think anything at all? I mean, if he just wanted us to do whatever he wanted to, then why let us do anything at all? It just doesn’t make any sense. So I figure, as long as you’re not the worse of the worst, you probably should be pretty okay for the most part.

ANDRE

But thats all just nonsense anyways. Obviously theres never really anything after everything that already happened. Once you’re dead, you’re dead. Thats all.

Miles shrugs.

MILES

Maybe. But I hope not.

EXT. FIRE PIT - NIGHT

Scorches of scathing light dance upon fallen shadows, illuminating drying figures who stare into the flames of burning possibility.

A rustle in the trees.

MILES

Did you hear that?

ANDRE

Probably just the wind.

Another rustle, closer than before.

Miles looks to Andre.

ANDRE

Its nothing, man. Stop worrying so much.

Rustling. Movement. Footsteps. Human sound.

Andre and Miles sit frozen in unkempt anxiety.

Out of the darkness steps a beautiful young figure of 16: SYDNEY.

Andre and Miles sit in stony awe as the young woman tugs at tangled branches within tangled hair.

SYDNEY

Do you mind if I...

ANDRE

No. No. Go right ahead.

Sydney flashes a shy smile and sits on a bench across from the two.

ANDRE

So uhhh...is there a reason for...all this, I mean...

SYDNEY

Oh, well, like, its sort of a long story or whatever, you know. With like, twists and turns and all that.

Andre nods quietly.

SYDNEY

Plus, like, its not like its worth anything or anything. Its kind of just sort of boring I guess.

ANDRE

Boring. Sure.

SYDNEY

Plus, like, you know, I don’t wanna be like, a bother or anything or whatever, you know. I just got a little lost is all. I mean, its not like I meant to or anything. I never meant to. No one ever means to. I mean, get lost and all that. I’m sure some people mean some things sometimes.

ANDRE

Sure.

SYDNEY

Well. Like I said, better be going then. I mean, I’d like to stay, I would. But, you know, I can’t. I couldn’t. Have to go. You know.

Sydney gets up to go.

MILES

Stay.

SYDNEY

I’m sorry?

MILES

Stay.

SYDNEY

No. I couldn’t. I can’t. I mean, I’ve already stayed too long already. I wouldn’t wanna be like, a bother or anything.

MILES

Stay.

Sydney, unsure, looks to Andre for some sort of support.

Andre nods kindly.

SYDNEY

Okay. Ya. Okay. Sure. I guess so. At least for a little while. Maybe just for a bit. But then, like I said, really, I should go.

MILES

Why?

SYDNEY

Oh, well, you know, cus like, I have to, you know. I mean like, if I didn’t, I wouldn’t, but I do, so...

MILES

No. Why here?

SYDNEY

I’m sorry?

MILES

Why here? Why now? Why through there?

Sydney smiles apologetically.

SYDNEY

Like I said, its really a really long story.

MILES

Then tell it then.

SYDNEY

Well I mean, I couldn’t...

MILES

(Calmly)

Tell it.

SYDNEY

Well I mean like, I guess I could if you really wanted me to. But then like, you know, then I should really like, you know, go or whatever.

Miles and Andre nod in agreement.

SYDNEY

Okay. Well. So like, I was walking in the woods or whatever, right? And like, everything was fine or whatever for the most part I guess. But then like, well, then like, I hear this like, sound, you know. Like this, loud sound. Like this, really loud sound. And like, I stop and turn and look and all that, you know, but like, I don’t see anything or anything. So I keep going. But then like, the sound gets louder, and louder, and louder, and then like, before I can even like, you know, do anything or anything, I see it. Really, I do. And I scream and I yell and stuff but before I can even like run or anything he’s like on top of me, you know, grabbing and clawing and all that. And I’m crying and screaming and yelling and stuff but before too long I realize this weird cackling sound I’ve been hearing is actually this sort of laughing, you know. Like this weird sort of laughing that I actually kind of already know. And so like, then I know just who it is and I take off that hood of his and who is it but my boyfriend Trevor just being like, a prick or whatever. So like, I kind of sort of hit him a little bit and kick him some too but not too hard really and he laughs and I laugh and its really all just fine and good for the most part I guess but then like he starts to like talking, you know, about like, whats going on or whatever. And I guess like, well, I guess like his parents are moving to Oregon or wherever and he has to like go too or whatever and I think thats just plain dumb and I tell him so too and he says so too but he says how he has to even though he doesn’t want to and he’s eighteen and everything and so I ask him why he has to and he says because thats just what he’s gotta do and I said I think thats really dumb and he says well what else can I do? I’m still in school just like you. And I said you should just quit and he says that he can’t just quit. And I said if he won’t I will and he says thats just plain dumb. But I decided to do it anyways and thats just what I did and I went home and told my parents but they were all like, you can’t. Like, what about college or whatever. Cus like I guess like I’m sort of smart or whatever cus like I got into some fancy school or whatever which I guess is fine for the most part or whatever, but like, whats the point, you know, of all this without love? Without him. And I told them so too and they said how I was just being like stupid and dumb and all that and a real cliche and stuff and they might as well just start calling me Juliet from now on. But I guess like they really should’ve called me Desdemona because not too long after my boyfriend started yelling and screaming and stuff cus like I sort of kind of kissed another boy barely. But just like on the cheek mostly, you know, and it was at a party and stuff and new years and he wasn’t even there even and I was pissed and drunk and goddamn’t I just wanted this year to be different, you know. Like I know we were never perfect or anything. I get that. But I figured if I just did this for him, the whole dropping out of school thing, then, you know, he would know how real I was about him, but like, he wasn’t, like not even like a little bit, and I’m like, I don’t even know what to do anymore, you know, I feel like Hamlet a little bit with all this indecision and stuff. So I tell my parents all this and they’re even more mad than before even because they’ve always hated him, you know, and before I didn’t tell them who I was dropping out for but now I was and that just made them even more mad even and everyone was just mad and I didn’t really know what else to do anymore and all I really wanted to do was cry, just cry. But I couldn’t. I couldn’t. So I just walked out and left and decided to never come back. Obviously I couldn’t take a car or anything cus I didn’t really have one really, just like one my parents had and stuff and I didn’t wanna be like a thief or anything, cus like I’m not really like that, you know. I just needed to get away for a little while or whatever. So I started walking and running and walking again pretty soon cus I got pretty tired pretty quick and the woods were quicker and faster and plus like I didn’t wanna like see anyone or anything, you know, at least not yet back then anyways; but then like I got a little lost or whatever, well a lot lost actually. So now I’m here looking like this. But not for too long really. Not too much longer actually. Soon I’ll be gone just as I came and then I’ll hitch a ride and then I’ll be in L.A and then I can finally be happy because then I can be what I really wanna be which is really all I really wanna do.

ANDRE

Whats that?

SYDENY

Its kind of embarrassing sort of.

ANDRE

You made it this far.

SYDENY

Ya, I guess so. I guess thats true. Well, really, honestly, like, to be real, all I really wanna do is be like in the movies and stuff, you know. I know, I know, a total cliche. But like, I don’t wanna be like an actor or anything, you know, like, I wanna, you know, like make em, you know, like a writer or director or something; but I know thats sort of stupid and dumb and who’d ever want a thing like that from a person like me anyways? I don’t know. I don’t know. I just, I don’t know. Maybe when I’m there it won’t sound so stupid anymore.

ANDRE

Its not stupid.

SYDENY

Ya? Really? You think so.

ANDRE

Sure I do. Don’t you Miles?

Miles shrugs.

MILES

Your mind is made, what else can I do?

Sydney gives a false chuckle.

SYDENY

Ya. I guess thats true.

ANDRE

Man, you’re such a cynic. I think its great. Really. I do. And I’m not just saying that cus you’re cute.

Sydney blushes, moving closer.

SYDENY

Really? You think so?

ANDRE

Honest. More than just cute. You’re beautiful.

MILES

Andre...

ANDRE

What? She is. Is she not?

MILES

How old are you?

Sydney mumbles.

ANDRE

What?

SYDENY

18...almost.

ANDRE

Almost?

SYDENY

Well, in a couple of years soon, not even that.

MILES

How many?

SYDENY

Two. Barely. I’m almost seventeen.

MILES

Go home.

SYDENY

What? No. Didn’t you hear me? Any of that? Didn’t you hear a word I just said? Were you even listening? I mean...

ANDRE

He’s right. Go home. Finish school. This life you’re living, or want to live anyways, it’s not worth living. None of it is. College, maybe, but at least finish high school. At least do that.

SYDNEY

And just give up everything?

Miles smiles sadly.

MILES

You’re not giving up anything. All you have is nothing. Anything is more than nothing.

SYDNEY

Thats not true!

ANDRE

It is kid. He’s right. Go back. Go home. Forget about us.

SYDNEY

Or what?

MILES

Or we’ll call the cops.

Andre gives Miles an odd look over.

MILES

I know a guy.

Sydney begins to cry and Andre moves close, wrapping his arms around her. Looking up, tears in her eyes, Sydney kisses Andre.

Andre pushes her away.

Sydney takes off her shirt.

MILES

Go home. You’re better off there.

Sydney nods, wipes her tears with her shirt, puts it back on, and steps into darkness.

EXT. COURTYARD - NIGHT

Vacant light grasps at hollow shadows as Andre and Miles lay upon a beat-up old basketball court of putrid age.

An old man, LESTER, with a broken cane, waddles towards the two with a haggard disposition, jabbing at Andre’s leg.

Andre, still in the midst of a haze, looks up from his weary daze.

LESTER

Ain’t you the kids that been messing with my hydrangeas?

ANDRE

Your what?

LESTER

Hydrangeas! My hydrangeas! Ain’t you them?

ANDRE

Ummm, no?

LESTER

Yes you is! I knows you is.

MILES

Then why’d you ask?

LESTER

Cus I ain’t no crook, is I?

MILES

What makes you a crook?

LESTER

I ain’t none go blaming nobody without knowing nothing!

ANDRE

But why’d you ask us man?

LESTER

Ain’t no proof less you fess it.

ANDRE

Man, we didn’t do nothing.

LESTER

You deny it then?

ANDRE

Course we do.

LESTER

Then yous guilty for sures.

ANDRE

What?

LESTER

Only the guilty deny the truth!

MILES

What will you have us do?

LESTER

Fess it! All of it! The truth.

MILES

But you don’t want the truth.

LESTER

Course I do.

ANDRE

Man, you playing.

LESTER

I ain’t playing.

MILES

What would you have us do?

LESTER

Know it. Thats it.

ANDRE

But we didn’t...

Miles grabs Andre’s shoulder.

MILES

Now we do. Thank you.

LESTER

Yous gonna fix it?

ANDRE

What?!

LESTER

The hydrangeas! You gonna fix it or what?

MILES

What.

LESTER

I always knews you folks were no good.

MILES

Perhaps an apology will do.

ANDRE

Apology?

MILES

(Sternly)

Yes. An apology.

ANDRE

Man, we done nothing worth doing.

LESTER

Well is ya or ain’t ya?

MILES

We’re very sorry. For you and your hydrangeas. We hope you find some peace in our regret.

LESTER

S’pose so. S’pose I have to. Ain’t got no other choice otherwise.

MILES

Unfortunately so.

The old man wobbles in the tottering wind.

ANDRE

We good?

LESTER

I ain’t none done yet!

MILES

No?

LESTER

No!

ANDRE

Why the hell not?

LESTER

I dying, ain’t I?

MILES

As much as anyone else.

LESTER

And I ain’t gonna live much longer, is I?

ANDRE

If there’s a God.

LESTER

Then shoot me goddamn’t!

ANDRE

What?

LESTER

I says, shoot me.

MILES

With what?

Lester fumbles around in his pockets for a while, before pulling out a small pistol.

LESTER

Here.

ANDRE

Man, forget that. I’m not shooting nobody.

LESTER

I ain’t asking you for nothin.

Miles looks thoughtfully at the gun.

ANDRE

Miles.

Miles moves from stoic silence to clear thought.

MILES

Why?

LESTER

Cus I asks ya to, thats why!

MILES

Thats not enough.

ANDRE

Enough? Man, nothing’s near enough.

LESTER

I gots my reasons.

MILES

What reasons?

LESTER

Ain’t nones of yous business.

MILES

Is if I shoot you.

ANDRE

What are you doing man?

MILES

Who am I to stop a man from dying?

ANDRE

Nothing. But he’s not asking to die. He’s asking to be shot.

MILES

Whats the difference?

ANDRE

Difference?! Man, thats just plain murder.

MILES

Even if he asks?

ANDRE

Especially if he asks.

Miles turns to Lester.

MILES

Well?

LESTER

If I tells ya, and you find it worth doing, you’ll do it, won’t ya?

MILES

On my honor.

ANDRE

Man, forget it. I’m out of here.

Andre begins towards the shadows.

LESTER

Waits nows, wills ya? I need the both of ya all for this.

ANDRE

He can shoot well enough for himself.

LESTER

Ain’t none bout no shooting. If he think I ain’t worth no nothin, I need you to knows it too. That ways, if it is murders we got, I ain’t none dead without no witness.

Andre stares, both amazed and horrified.

MILES

Go if you want. Better if you do, probably. But know if you do, and you hear something like a shot, you’ll never know what you didn’t do.

Andre stands coldly in space, lost to time in curious frustration.

ANDRE

Fine. I’ll stay. But for the verdict only. When you’re done, I’m done, and I’m getting the hell out of here.

Miles nods.

MILES

So be it. And the gun, sir. I’ll need that too. Wouldn’t want you killing regardless.

LESTER

S’pose thats right fair nuff.

Lester hands over the gun.

The three stand in momentary silence.

ANDRE

Well?

LESTER

I’s allowed to think, ain’t I?

MILES

Haven’t you enough already?

LESTER

S’pose so. S’pose thats true. S’pose I best be gettin to it if I wants to get through. Wells, here it is. All of it. Every last bit of it. But first, can I sit? These knees ain’t holding like they used to.

Miles gestures towards a bench just a few feet off.

Lester shuffles his way over and creaks to sit.

LESTER

As I was saying, I ain’t always been what I is. Once I was what I was. And what I was was mighty fine back in my day. Real fine. Sees, I used to be a cowboy and such, out in the west. Herding animals mostly, though chief redskin now and again got me some illegals to wrangle too, which I never did too much minded. But sees, it was on one of these occasions that I met this fine young lady as such. Sees, this was about fifty years back or so and back then I was a fine young man for the most part. So’s you can imagine my predicament with the ladies. They all wanting what I got, but what I got weren’t none for the taking. See’s, I was a married man as such. But nots to no woman or nothin. But my work. And I’s work hard at it too. So I ain’t have no time for no ladies. But this lady. This lady was different. Ain’t that she was special pretty or nothin, she was fine for the most part, but nothin special. No, sees, it was more of this sort of look in her eyes, this pitying sort of look, that was also sort of proud. Well, it got me into a bit of a tangle, and I told her so too, and wouldn’t you know it, she just go right on smiling right on through. Through the wrangling and capturing and jailing and deporting too. And she goes and gets gone just like the rest. But I ain’t none much forget bout her. Nor her smile also. And soons I start seeing that smile on lots of faces, lots of illegals, and I get to knowing that its not the girl I loving, but the smile. Its that smile that gets me going. And soon every one of em got it and I just don’t know what else to do. I tells them to stop it and forget it but they don’t none do, not even a bit, no matter how hard I hit, as if they downright laughing at me. And they is. They is. At least I think they is. So I stop being so nice to em any more and start hitting real good. But that just makes em smile even more. And at first its only the big ones, the mens. But then the girls too. Kids even. And thats when it really gets me. So I start hitting even harder. But soon I get hitting too hard, and, well, one of them kids ain’t none get back up again. Course I can’t none hide it none, lots of em saw it, so I did what I had to. I killed em, every last one of em. Men, women, children, all of em. Lined em up right there and shot em. And they’s bawling and crying but I ain’t none stopping. But then I get to this last one, and she done laughing. I mean really laughing. And I gets to thinking, hows I ever gonna know nothin if I ain’t none ever asking. So I do. And this is what she says, she says, I’m laughing cus I’m happy. And I asks how she done ever be happy and she says “Cus I am. Cus I can be. Cus I ain’t none ever got to be.” Cus of the whole killing thing and all that. And I says what good is that when you’re good and dead and she says “nothing better” cus of that whole god thing and what have you and also living ain’t so much no great no more neither now that they’re soon as good as dead but worse cus they gotta get jailed first and raped first and who knows what else first too. And so’s this is like a sort of suicide of sorts but really much more of a crucifixion of a kind cus this ain’t gonna stop em from heaven or nothing like the other but rather just not that cus now theys gonna be there even faster cus theys died for a good cause or whatever. Though to this day I ain’t none ever known no cause no man ever worth dying for. But that ain’t none the point. Point is, she says she’s laughing cus now she gonna go to heaven and all that and how I’m her savior and what have you and she just plain happy cus she always wanted to go to heaven but ain’t never really got the chance as of yet and so’s I was doin her a sort of favor of sorts or what have you. And I sits there and think there and don’t none pull the trigger there for a good long while there and I think she must be kidding me. Ain’t no way she ain’t none kidding me. She just trying to get out of it all is all. And thats just what I decided and shot her just the same. Just like the others too. But that smile don’t ever none leave her face. Ain’t none leave none of those faces mostly. And I guess thats what got me. Thats what really get me. That face that never none leaving. That almost joy almost. And I just couldn’t do it no more. I just couldn’t do none of it no more. So I stopped. And downright went and forgot about it. And...

ANDRE

Wait. You just killed all those people and got away with it?

LESTER

Course I did! They illegals, ain’t they? Anyways, as I was saying, after that I just went and forgot about it, or tried to anyways, and I went to drinking and herding just the real thing mostly and that was fine for the most part for a good 42 years or so but then something just downright happened. Just a few weeks ago by my reckoning. This girl come up to me, old girl, almost as old as me almost, and says, she says, do you remember me, and I says, I ain’t none remember nobody ain’t worth no remembering and she says you killed me and I says you look mighty fine for dead and she says thats just it, I nones never got to. And then I gets to thinking and knowing and then I knows just who it is. Its that first girl with that terrible smile all those years ago and I says I knows you and remembers you and she says good cus now shes gonna tell me how it really is and she told me just that. Guess she watched her family die in that prison for the most part, ‘cept for the few who survived and starved in Mexico and died again soon. And she watched as her father and mother and brother and sister refused to eat so she, the youngest, could, and she did goddamn’t, she did. And watched her family die as she killed em too. She wasn’t none growing fat none but ain’t none growing no skinny neither. And over the years they died one by one terrible and awful deaths till it was just her and her sister and she told her sister she can’t die too and her sister says please, do, kill her, don’t let her die like the rest, with terrible pains and misery and what have you. And so she did, she downright did. And then she left and changed her name and came back here and lived here and survived here and looked here until she finally found me here and she told me all this and she asked me what I was gonna do about all this and I says I was gonna give her what she never got and she gives me a small smile and says how its long too late for that now, she good as dead now. She wronged and sinned and now all that waits is a good long hell and she’ll never see no one never again cus she killed and murdered and even tried suicide once even but just couldn’t none do it none and then she left and then she was gone and thens I didn’t knows what else to do but plant some hydrangeas and so I did but now those are gone too. Off to a better place I suppose probably and I think maybe I can go theres too, maybe I can be there too, but not none if I do it myself. And if that ain’t for me. If that ain’t where I gotta be. If hells where I gots to be, then thats okay too, cus at least I can give that poor girl some company, even if she ain’t none want it, cus she sure as hell gonna need it, and ain’t that just the something I can do, give her some sort of company for all of eternity?

ANDRE

Damn, you’ve really thought this through, haven’t you?

LESTER

Ain’t you if it happened to you?

MILES

I’d imagine so since it happened to you.

LESTER

So’s you shooting or ain’t ya?

Miles gives a sad sigh.

MILES

No. Death for you would be easy. Death to you is an escape. A release from your misery. You murdered that poor girl, just like you murdered the rest, and no amount of pity can forgive your misery.

ANDRE

Man, give me that, I’ll do it myself.

Andre grabs the weapon, cocks it, and points it at Lester.

ANDRE

Any last words?

LESTER

God forgive me for what I didn’t do.

Andre pulls the trigger.

A thunderous boom.

A solid thud.

Lester lays on the ground, dead.

EXT. FIELD - NIGHT

Barren soil decays dying weeds as Miles and Andre bury a long dug grave.

An industrial looking contraption of another era glares upon the ground with its bitter light, powered by a long snake of a cord which slithers down the field.

As they succumb to the inevitable end of their service, a man of middle age approaches. A long, lanky man, with sad, lonely eyes, and an even sadder disposition.

The man, STEPHEN, kicks at the ground.

STEPHEN

So uhhh, is there a reason for...

MILES

No.

STEPHEN

You mean you’re just out here in the middle of nowhere in the middle of the night just digging for no reason?

MILES

Yes.

STEPHEN

And I’m just supposed to believe that without any explanation whatsoever?

MILES

Yes.

STEPHEN

And how exactly...

ANDRE

Man, who are you to say what we do? What makes you so goddamn special? You out here just the same too.

Stephen stammers a little.

STEPHEN

No. I...uhh...you don’t understand...I’m just...a little bit, lost, is all.

ANDRE

You and everyone else around here.

STEPHEN

Its as good a place as any.

ANDRE

Better must be. Must be the best probably. All these people from all these places all coming here exactly. And for what I wonder? Advice from some ignorant fools like us? Man, forget that. But I guess you won’t just go, will ya? Have to be told, don’t ya? Well c’mon then. What is it then? Spit it out. Killer? Rapist? Leprosy?

STEPHEN

No. No. Nothing like that. Just a cheater is all.

Miles nods sadly.

MILES

You’re almost ashamed and seek some sort of forgiveness.

STEPHEN

I don’t seek anything. I’m just looking is all.

ANDRE

Well thats not so bad, what’d you do, have a girl you weren’t supposed to? Maid? Cook? Girl down the block?

STEPHEN

I don’t really much see it that way.

MILES

Love often blinds the lost.

STEPHEN

I don’t know. Maybe.

MILES

But who are we to judge? We who know nothing of anything about anything.

STEPHEN

Well its not very lecherous if thats what your thinking. Nor lewd neither. Just sad is all.

MILES

All the more reason.

ANDRE

Jesus Christ.

MILES

Is it so much to listen?

ANDRE

Ya, well, whatever. You go right on ahead if you want to, but I’m not killing anybody anymore again.

STEPHEN

Again?

MILES

You won’t have to.

STEPHEN

I’m sorry, but, did he just say again?

ANDRE

Good, cus I won’t. Last time was bad enough.

STEPHEN

Wait a minute, what do you mean last time? Last time what? Last time you killed somebody? Did he just say he killed somebody?

MILES

And he won’t again, probably.

STEPHEN

Probably?!

MILES

Not today, at least.

STEPHEN

Today?!

MILES

But thats neither here nor there.

STEPHEN

Isn’t it though?

MILES

If you’d rather go.

STEPHEN

Go?! And what?! Get murdered? Ya. No. No thanks.

MILES

Then stay.

STEPHEN

And get killed?

ANDRE

Well it seems to me like you’ll die either way.

STEPHEN

Well its not as if I want to!

ANDRE

So might as well just go and get on with it then. Ya? So at least you can die in some sort of peace anyways.

Stephen nods anxiously.

STEPHEN

Yes. Yes. Well. Better. With a good clean conscience and all that. Thats what I better do.

Stephen pauses.

ANDRE

You talking or what?

STEPHEN

Yes. Yes. Well. Better...See, the thing is, well, see, its sort of like this. My wife, you see, well, she’s very beautiful, you know. Like, the most beautiful, probably. And I love her, a lot. Like, more than a lot. I do. But sometimes, you know, well, sometimes, she gets into these sort of, moods, you know. No fault of her own. No fault of anybodies. Just the way things go, you know. And I know that and get that and thats all fine and good and all that for the most part, but the thing is, well, these moods, you see, well, these moods, well, sometimes, last a little bit longer than a little long time. Weeks even. Months actually. And these moods, well, these moods often lead to a lack of, well, you know, desire. And its not like I’m a particularly particular man or anything, I can handle myself well enough for the most part. But when weeks turns to months and months to years, well, eventually, well, eventually it gets to be a little more than a little bother, you know. More than that, it gets downright depressing. It makes me feel like I’m no good, you know. Like maybe she has somebody she really likes. Somebody she really loves. Cus its not like she’s completely barren or anything. She has her moments: her books and her movies and all that. And I don’t judge her for that, you know, whatever gets you going I guess. The thing is, though, its just, well, it seems, at least to me at least, like she gets a lot more there than she does here, you know. And its not like I’m exactly against that stuff or anything, its just, well, if there, then, why not here? Why not for real? You know? And it gets me to thinking that maybe its me. Maybe its something about me. The way I look. The way I act. Maybe a performance issue or something. I don’t know. So I ask her so too and she says its mostly nothing really, she loves me a lot, really. And we try a couple of things here and there but nothing really works so well so much really. And I don’t really watch that stuff anyways, you know, its not really my thing, but everyone has to get off somehow I suppose. So, I don’t know. I think, maybe, if I just went to like, a professional or something, you know, that would be the end of it. And I mean, when you think about it, its really not that different, really. Better even. Cus like, theres no exlpoitation or anything or whatever. I mean, where I go, its all legal and clean and safe and all that. And its not like anybody has to do anything or anything. Its their choice. You know. Its what they want to do. And its all good medically too, you know, they get checked out regularly. And all well above legal too, no one under 21, so you know theres no minors or anything. Plus, like, this is real love, you know. These women really love what they do. Its not like just a job to them, you know, they actually care about what they do. Its very primal and human and nothing like that fake stuff you see on tv. So I thought I’d just try it, you know, just this once, just to see how it is. So I do, and I pick a girl and meet a girl and shes really very nice really. Not really the prettiest or biggest or anything, but, theres just something about her, you know. Just something, I don’t know, different. I can’t really explain it. She just is, I guess. Anyways, after a while, I feel a whole lot better. Like a lot better really. And soon my wife and I are better too. But then I go again. And again. And again. And you know, its not really a money thing or anything, its nothing like that. My wife and I are pretty okay for the most part. So its not like its a monetary thing or anything. But it still starts to get noticed, you know. Me being gone all the time and all that. And I mean, at first its just once, you know, just a few times actually. But then its a few more than a few times, a lot of times actually. And always the same girl too. Of course, my wife didn’t know that. She just knew I was gone is all. And she starts to asking. And to me, the worst part of cheating is the lying, you know. Like, if you kiss a drunken coworker or get down with a guy a little high, thats fine, thats okay. I get that. Forgive and forget, you know. But when you lie about it, when you straight up tell something you knows not true, well, thats what really gets me. You know. So I tell her. The truth. All of it. And she flips. She freaks. And I get it. I do. What I did maybe I shouldn’t do. But then again, who was she to judge me? Watching all those poor young boys and girls getting raped pretty much. Encouraging this hostile relationship between love and hate. And I say so too. And she says how its not nearly the same. How what I did was so much worst somehow. But I don’t think so. I don’t think thats true. I think she’s just plain wrong. And I told her so too. Well, she didn’t really take to that too kindly. Told me to go right back to my slobbering whore for all she cared. And so thats just what I did. But turns out, cruel fate as it is, the girl had up and left just a few weeks prior, guess it’d been a little longer than I thought apparently, busy with work and all, you know, but I don’t know. But she was gone, you know. First my wife, then my whore, and I just couldn’t take it anymore. So I just up and left. I just took what I could and walked away forever. No car. No luggage. No nothing, just me as I am. And now I’m here with you. Going who knows where for who knows how long. I mean, I hope you don’t shoot me. I hope you don’t kill. But having said all that I’ve said, now that I’ve said it, maybe its better if you do.

MILES

Why should we?

STEPHEN

I cheated.

MILES

You fell in love. What fault is that?

ANDRE

Plus. Even if it was. Even if you did. You didn’t know what you did. You didn’t know it was worse. And its not like you lied man. You didn’t lie. I mean, what’d you do that she didn’t do, to a certain extent at least. So you shopped around. Who cares? Who doesn’t every now and again? Its not like you went and fell in love, did you?

STEPHEN

Not at all.

MILES

Lust is love too in its own sort of way.

STEPHEN

Well maybe in that way maybe. But not like in a real way really. Just like a handshake I guess. Just like that.

Miles gives a sad smile.

MILES

You trivialize love for the sake of sanity.

STEPHEN

And what makes you so high and mighty? With your quasi smarts and pseudo theology. As if speaking in haikus somehow makes you intelligent. If you’re so smart, why don’t you just tell me what to do?

MILES

Forgive.

STEPHEN

Her?

MILES

Your wife.

ANDRE

Man, forget that. Don’t even think about doing that. You’re better than that. Don’t go crying back to that cold hard bitch.

MILES

Do you love her?

STEPHEN

I think so.

Miles frowns.

MILES

Too bad.

STEPHEN

Whats wrong with that?

MILES

Nothing if you did. But you don’t.

STEPHEN

But I just said...

ANDRE

Nah man. You don’t get it. You don’t love her, cus you can’t. If you did, you would. There’d be no thinking about it. But you do, so you don’t. You think it, therefore you can’t be it. If you loved her, you’d know.

Stephen nods sadly.

STEPHEN

So thats it then.

MILES

I’m sorry.

STEPHEN

Don’t be. What loss is love to you? Its not you thats lost everything of you.

MILES

Giving and losing are hardly the same.

STEPHEN

Ya, well, maybe you got that one right for once. Maybe I did just go and throw it all away.

ANDRE

Man, forget that. Theres someone out there somewhere for you.

Stephen holds a sad smile.

STEPHEN

For you maybe, but probably not for me. For me, maybe, its better if I just don’t.

MILES

Thats more than necessary.

STEPHEN

Less than I deserve.

ANDRE

Damn man. You’re too hard on yourself. So you got a girl, so what?

STEPHEN

You don’t get it. Maybe you can’t. I loved her, you know. I do. Or at least, I did anyways. But if I don’t, which it seems to me like I don’t, what do I do then? I’ve always loved her, from beginning to end, and now, I don’t, for no good reason whatsoever. I guess thats what I get for being such a prick.

Stephen gives a false smile, and holds out his hand.

STEPHEN

Mind if I?

MILES

You’ll excuse me if I don’t.

STEPHEN

I guess thats fair. What about you?

ANDRE

Sure. Why not. I got nothing against you.

Andre and Stephen shake hands.

STEPHEN

Goodbye, then. I hope your digging goes well.

Stephen walks out of the light and into the darkness.

INT. KITCHEN - NIGHT

Rushing water encompasses dirt beaten hands as Miles rubs vigorously with weary tiredness.

Across from him, upon the island, sits Andre, snacking on a bowl of kids’ cereal.

Moonlight peaks through large glass doors of dirtied disposition.

From the moonlight and to the door approaches a girl of no more than ten.

The girl knocks on the door.

The two men stare, awed by the oddity.

The girl waves hello.

The two men wave.

The girl, AUDREY, motions the men to the door, and so do the men follow, the three staring at each other from opposite ends of the glass.

The little girl taps on the glass, pointing to the lock.

The two men, cautious, weary, unlock the door, and remove the glass which once separated the three.

The little girl smiles, and runs into the house, up to the counter, and begins munching on Andre’s cereal.

The two men move to the kitchen, the girl far across the foreboding island.

ANDREA

So uhhh, where’s your mommy, sweetie?

Audrey ignores Andre.

ANDRE

Little girl? Did you hear me? Wheres your mama and papa?

The little girl continues to say nothing.

ANDRE

Parents? Do you understand? Mom and Dad. Ma and Pa? Do you get me?

The little girls does nothing to acknowledge Andre.

Andre looks exasperatingly at Miles.

Miles sighs, walks around the island, and pulls away the cereal.

The little girl claws at him, but Miles stoically holds her away.

The little girl screams.

Andre hops over the island, grabs the cereal, and gives it back to the girl.

ANDRE

Are you crazy or something? You got neighbors man! If they hear a little girl like this screaming like that, well, they already hate you already! I can’t imagine this much helping.

MILES

You got a better idea?

ANDRE

Better than this!

MILES

What?

ANDRE

I don’t know! Anything.

MILES

She can’t stay.

ANDRE

You think I don’t know that?

MILES

We gotta get her home.

ANDRE

I know that!

Andre turns to the girl.

ANDRE

Honey, sweetie, ms, do you know where that is? Home? Do you know where that is?

The little girl puts down her spoon, stands, and walks out the door.

The two men look at each other.

The girl, on the edge of moonlight, motions them near, and the two follow.

EXT. WOODS - NIGHT

The young girl tumbles through the woods as the two men follow at a weary pace.

Andre whispers to Miles.

ANDRE

Man, we gotta get out of here. This girl is creepy as hell.

MILES

She’s just a kid. What can we do?

ANDRE

Man, just let her go. Forget about her. She seems fine enough to me.

MILES

What if she’s lost?

ANDRE

Man! She’s the one leading the way.

The girl stops, turns to the two, and the two likewise stop.

A reflective moonlight bounces off a small object in her hand.

ANDRE

Uhhhh. Miles. Whats that?

The girl gives a cold smile.

MILES

I believe thats a gun Andre.

ANDRE

Right. Right. Right.

Andre sprints into the distance.

The thunderous blow of a shot.

A scorching scream.

Andre limps back to Miles, shot in the calf.

ANDRE

Okay. So maybe we don’t run.

Miles nods.

ANDRE

What do you think she wants?

MILES

Only one way to know.

Miles slowly walks towards the girl.

ANDRE

Miles! Miles! Man! Are you crazy?!

Miles steps close to the girl, onto his knees, the gun only a few feet away.

MILES

You’re hurt.

Audrey shakes her head vigilantly.

MILES

Who hurt you?

The little girl shakes her head, on the verge of tears.

MILES

What did he do?

The girl begins to cry.

MILES

Can I have that?

The girl violently points the gun at Miles.

MILES

Okay. Okay. Thats okay. You just keep that. Just tell me whats wrong, ya?

In the background, far behind, Andre slowly backs away, still limping.

Another shot.

Andre cries.

ANDRE

You know what? I think I’m just gonna stay here!

MILES

Thats not very nice, is it?

Audrey shakes her head.

MILES

It was really very mean, don’t you think?

Audrey shakes her head.

MILES

No? Why not?

AUDREY

He hurt me.

MILES

Who? Andre?

Audrey nods.

MILES

What did he do?

AUDREY

He tried to leave me.

MILES

And you don’t like that.

Audrey shakes her head.

MILES

Well, he won’t leave you ever again. Neither of us will. But you need to give us that, ya? The gun. Can you do that for us?

Audrey shakes her head.

MILES

No? Why not?

AUDREY

Mean people never leave.

MILES

Are we mean?

Audrey shakes her head.

MILES

Who is?

AUDREY

Friends.

MILES

Friends are mean? What friends?

AUDREY

All of them!

MILES

Maybe they’re not you’re friends then. But we’re your friends.

Audrey shakes her head.

AUDREY

I don’t have any friends anymore.

MILES

Why not?

AUDREY

I killed them.

Miles swallows heavily.

MILES

Killed?

Audrey nods.

MILES

How?

AUDREY

School. In class.

MILES

Why?

AUDREY

They hurt me. They hit me. They made fun of me. They called me a slut and a whore. They called me stupid. I’m not stupid.

MILES

No. Of course not. What happened then?

AUDREY

Then I ran. And I ran and I ran.

MILES

And now you’re here.

Audrey nods.

MILES

And how did you get that?

AUDREY

Daddy.

MILES

Daddy has a gun?

Audrey nods.

MILES

In a safe?

Audrey shakes her head.

MILES

Just sitting around?

Audrey nods.

MILES

And you took it? And put it in your backpack? And took it to school?

Audrey nods.

MILES

Did he hurt you?

AUDREY

Who?

MILES

Your daddy?

AUDREY

Daddy never hurt me. Daddy loves me.

MILES

And mommy?

AUDREY

Mom’s dead.

MILES

Did he touch you?

Audrey nods.

AUDREY

He loved me.

MILES

Where?

AUDREY

Anywhere.

MILES

And so you took his gun?

Audrey nods.

MILES

And shot your friends?

Audrey nods.

MILES

And ran away?

Audrey nods.

MILES

And now?

Audrey shrugs.

Miles sighs, and looks back to Andre.

MILES

Why don’t you come back with us? We won’t hurt you. We won’t touch you. With us you’ll be safe.

Audrey shakes her head.

MILES

Its okay. It’ll be okay. We won’t tell anybody. Not even ourselves.

Audrey shakes her head.

MILES

What then?

Audrey shrugs, looking down.

MILES

Okay. Well. How bout this? Me and him, we’ll go back home, ya? Back that way. And if you want to, you can go too. But if not. Thats okay too. You just do what you want to? Okay?

Audrey nods, still looking down.

Miles slowly backs away, looking at the girl.

Miles steps over Andre, and picks him up.

ANDRE

Crazy bitch.

MILES

She might come back.

ANDRE

What?

MILES

I invited her.

ANDRE

Man! Are you crazy or something?

MILES

She’s hurt.

ANDRE

She? What about me?

MILES

You’re fine.

ANDRE

You call this fine!

MILES

I call it nothing.

ANDRE

Man, she’s gonna get us killed.

Miles shrugs.

MILES

Maybe thats best.

ANDRE

What? Man! Put me down! I’m not getting shot by that crazy bitch.

MILES

You already were.

ANDRE

Not again!

MILES

Whats it matter? We’ll all die eventually.

ANDREA

Ya, of like, cancer or some shit! Not shot by some 10 year old kid.

Miles shrugs.

MILES

Death is death.

The two reach the house.

ANDRE

Shit man. Just put me down. You got gauze?

Miles nods.

ANDRE

Well don’t just stand there!

Miles stands there, staring into the woods.

ANDRE

Man!

Miles absently nods, and walks into the house.

Andre resists the primal urge to groan.

From the woods appears a young woman of 23, academic in look, but athletic in stance.

PENELOPE, the young woman, approaches Andre, and sits with an absent mind.

ANDRE

Of course you are you.

PENELOPE

Who else can I be?

ANDRE

Whats your problem then? Some big moral epidemic I assume?

Penelope shrugs.

PENELOPE

Something like that.

ANDRE

Ya? And whats it to you? Whats it to me? Whats it matter what anybody does that doesn’t bother me?

PENELOPE

I was raped.

ANDRE

Well I’m sorry about that but what good will telling me do?

PENELOPE

At least thats what I said. Thats what I claimed. To the police. The admin. At school. I had to. I didn’t know what else to do.

ANDRE

You mean, you weren’t?

PENELOPE

I was, in a way that I wasn’t. I mean, like, I was, but, its sort of complicated.

ANDRE

Complicated how? Did he or didn’t he?

PENELOPE

I mean, he did. I know he did. I was there. Its just, I was a little drunk, you know, and he was even more so, I think. I don’t know. I don’t really much remember. And at the time, I think I said no maybe, but maybe I didn’t. Maybe I said just the opposite. I mean, he was a good looking guy I guess, and we were friends for the most part or whatever. And its not like we hadn’t thought about it before or anything. But I don’t know. I don’t really remember. And I was just gonna kind of forget about it or whatever. Like just let it go and all that. Cus like, whatever happened, happened, you know, no ones fault, just two stupid drunks. So that was gonna be the end of it. That was gonna be the end. But then like I told some friends about it, just some close friends really, about how like I wasn’t really sure or whatever, and they said how I was just like feeling guilty and all that, like I’m just trying to remember it different than how it was. Like he was totally getting on to me or whatever, you know, and I was totally not even a little bit interested. Which maybe might of been more than a little true. So in their eyes, at least to them, I was as good as raped pretty much. And word got around. People started talking. Then they started asking. And at first it didn’t really much matter. I didn’t really much care. I just told them the same thing I told you, it was just a stupid mistake or something. But the more I thought about it, the more I thought maybe it wasn’t. Maybe he had. But I didn’t wanna like, say anything or anything, that wasn’t true or whatever, or maybe might not of been true maybe, so I didn’t. But of course, then some wacko blogger got a hold of it and the whole thing just went sideways. And at that point, figuring someone had to do something about anything, admin got involved. The college or whatever. And I get it, I do, they had to be like looking out for somebody too. That somebody just so happened to be them. So they suspended him, put him on trial or whatever, at least until the whole rape thing blew over. But of course, that just made him look even more guilty even, even more less innocent, and the parents didn’t really like it, and neither did I really, but that just made things even more worse somehow. And when I tried to defend him, or at least tried to make sense of it, people just pitied me and scathed me and called me a bitch. But I guess some called me a whore too. And everyone called me stupid. But I didn’t know what else to do. Everything I said was wrong. Everything I did was even worse. And then they wanted to bring him to court too. To put him on trial or whatever. Just a stupid sex thing I didn’t even want to talk about even in the first place. I could barely tell my friends even, let alone a jury. And now the whole world prosecuting. I just couldn’t do it. I couldn’t even a little bit. Defending him, defaming me, him a rapist, me worse. And what was I supposed to do, just pretend that wasn’t the truth, that wasn’t what happened, when, I don’t know, I don’t really know what happened. I mean, I think he was drunk and stupid and drunk stupid people do drunk stupid things. And I was drunk too I guess, but maybe really I wasn’t really into it. Maybe I did say no. For the life of me, I can’t really much remember much. I wish I could. I wish I did. I want to. I do. But I can’t. Not even a little bit. And now I don’t know what else to do. I mean, whether I testify or not, say anything or nothing, the verdict is made, the decision long gone, guilty all along, from beginning to the end. Even if he runs free, the law calls him innocent, no one whose anyone ever really will. And maybe thats right, maybe what he did was wrong and he does deserve that. Most of them do. Almost all of them really. And so many never do. And thats the real problem really. Cus like, if I say he didn’t or couldn’t or might not of been maybe then what will that mean for the next person probably. Everything always depends on everything else, you know, and I don’t wanna like ruin anything for anybody else. I mean, so many people are never even believed even, you know. I mean, I guess I’m not either a little bit but I feel like this is sort of different somehow. Like his family can’t afford it like the others can. I mean, he’s not rich or anything, nowhere near rich, his family’s going bankrupt because of this. And I feel like its my fault a little bit, and they do too, but more than just a little bit. But he doesn’t. Not him. We don’t talk about it. We don’t talk at all. Not even a little bit. How could we? With the way thing are and were and going to be anyways. But I don’t know. I don’t know. I just know he doesn’t hate me. I know he can’t ever hate me. How could he hate me? Its not my fault I was pretty much raped pretty much.

ANDRE

I wish I could tell you something to make you feel less miserable.

PENELOPE

Theres nothing you can say. Nothing you can do even. Its pretty much all over and done for the most part now. Now I just have to move schools, maybe countries maybe, change names maybe, and pretend I’m somebody I’m not. And just move on too. Thats all.

ANDRE

Man, running never got nobody no where.

PENELOPE

I’m not running. I’m leaving. Its different.

ANDRE

Different how?

PENELOPE

Running assumes I have something to run from. Something to escape. Something to forget. But what can I forget? What can I escape? What happened is over and done and will probably just as soon be forgotten again. Might as well just move on.

ANDRE

Well, if theres anything I can...

PENELOPE

I’d really like it if you’d just shut up about it.

Andre nods and sits in silence.

PENELOPE

I should go. Its getting pretty late. You should really have that looked at though. I should know. I’m pretty much a doctor pretty much.

Andre nods, Penelope stands, and before too long is well gone too.

Miles appears a few moments later, gauze in hand.

Andre moves to sit, painfully stretching his legs straight.

ANDRE

You know this stuff?

Miles shrugs.

MILES

Got a better idea?

ANDRE

Man, you tripping if you thinking I ain’t going to no hospital.

MILES

And what will you say?

ANDRE

I got shot!

MILES

By a little girl?

ANDRE

Well its true!

MILES

And who will believe you?

ANDRE

Man, whats it matter what anyone believes? I thought they weren’t supposed to ask that stuff anyways.

MILES

They’re not. But they will.

ANDRE

So what?

MILES

So they’ll think I did it.

ANDRE

So what if they do?

MILES

So I’ll be tried.

ANDRE

And be fine.

MILES

And be jailed.

ANDRE

Man, you don’t know that.

MILES

They already want me already, do you think this will do me any good?

ANDRE

Well just drop me off out front then. I can figure it out for myself well enough.

Miles shakes his head solemnly.

MILES

Barely hit. No bone. Some muscle. Hardly even skin. You’ll be fine.

ANDRE

Oh so you’re a doctor now?

Miles shrugs.

MILES

I’ve read around.

ANDRE

Man you can’t just read about these things.

MILES

I did.

ANDRE

Well it ain’t the same man!

MILES

Ya? Whats the difference?

Miles steps away, revealing an expertly wrapped set of bandages.

ANDRE

Well what about the bullets?

MILES

Gone.

ANDRE

And the shots?

MILES

Maybe they’ll forget.

ANDRE

Man, you’re the one being all paranoid and shit! You think they’re just gonna straight up forget.

MILES

No. But I’d prefer it if they did.

ANDRE

Man, no one gives a shit about what you prefer.

The flashing of lights.

ANDRE

Damn, they here already.

Miles nods, stands, and turns to the lights.

MILES

Maybe its nothing.

ANDRE

You crazy if you think its nothing. Them cops got you good as covered.

Miles nods.

MILES

Better go and get it over with then.

ANDRE

Man, you go over there and you’re bound to get shot.

Miles shrugs.

MILES

Could be worse.

ANDRE

Ya? How?

MILES

Could be dead.

ANDRE

Might as well be with the way you’re going.

MILES

Guess theres only way to find out.

Miles approaches the flashing lights.

EXT. HILL - NIGHT

At the top of a hill, Miles sways with the wind, silhouetted by the glow of a glaring porch light.

From the car, which the flashing lights wail, exits a young man of sixteen, often called JONAH.

Jonah approaches Miles.

JONAH

Sorry to barge in on you like this, but pops says you got a gun on you or something. Or rather, he heard one and think you the one who got it. I’m not here to arrest you or nothing, I’m just barely 17 even, pops just told me to check it out or whatever, but seeing that you don’t none got one, I’ll call it as good as got.

MILES

Your dads a cop?

Jonah nods.

JONAH

Ya, the one you met a little while back. Earlier today I think. S’pose it’d be yesterday by now though. Sorry about that. He can be a real hard ass sometimes, especially against you folks. You know, people like you. Not like I got nothing against you or nothing. Got nothing against nobody for the most part. Long as they ain’t some woo woo sally or whatever.

Miles gives Jonah an odd expression.

JONAH

You know, like fags and the like. I mean, you know, to each his own I guess, but like, why do I gotta be part of it? Like, how does that have anything to do with me. You don’t see me chomping on some girl in the park, do ya? So why should they, those creepy fags. I mean, just keep your gay to yourself, you know. Don’t go none bothering me none. And thats even if you wanna call em he. I mean, call em whatever you like, but don’t go telling me how to call you. Like I ain’t none taking no course on how to be talking to you. Just go by whatever you want, you know, but don’t go making me say it too. And don’t get none offended if I ain’t none remember it neither. What the hell’s a Xe anyways? Man, I don’t know. I wish things were like how they used to be. I mean, not with like the niggers or the lynchings or nothing, like nobody much never wants that no more, but just like, you know, freedom to do what you want, you know, and nobody none telling you what to do or who to be. Like, if you look like a man, I’m gonna call you a man. Woman, the same. I don’t nones care if you is or you ain’t. Why should I give a damn? Get whatever genitalia you want, just don’t go demanding nothing from me. I mean, isn’t that what states rights is all about: freedom of the individual or whatever. Like Kentucky ain’t no Oregon no none bit, so whys the hell they telling us to do just the same anyways? And the whole baker thing, I mean, if I ain’t none gonna bake for you, I ain’t gonna bake, don’t none matter what reason for it. Not that I’m for racism or nothing. I’m just saying, if you all so gay, why you shopping at one of those super conservative establishments anyways? Like, nigger, go to the effing flying unicorn or whatever. Don’t go to God’s holy cupcakes or whatever. Know where you’re wanted. Nobody is ever wanted everywhere. Everyone’s hated somewhere. And I think its bout time we start to get knowing that. That everybody’s got to be offended sometime. Like, that just is how it is, you knows? But I don’t know, maybe thats just me just talking. What do you think? About these fags or homos or whatever you wanna call em. You withem or against em? Or you just like me. Thinking who wants to get none married anyways. But I guess I’m just a kid in that way. Not that I ain’t none ever tried that stuff, you know. Its just not for me. Not my cup of tea. Too messy, you know. Rather just think about it and talk about it and look at it, but never really get really into it, you know. Plus, like, all those marriages ending with not marrying, like, whats the point, you know. Like, I ain’t none need no government knowing everything. Got nuff troubles as it is already, let alone some government hunting me down cus of some god damn marriage certificate. Just get over it, you know. Ain’t enough people got enough rights as is?

MILES

Maybe its the fact that you refer to any people as those people that gets any people riled up.

JONAH

Well hows else is I supposed to differentiate all of those from all of them. I mean we ain’t none just all just the sames, you know. We’re all like snowflakes or whatever. But like, lots of snowflakes look lots the same, even if they ain’t all exactly that. So like, this just helps organize things, you know. I mean, ain’t nobody getting mad when you call fruit fruit or trees trees. They just is what they is. And people is too, even if they don’t none wanna be. But whatever man. Everyone gotta be complaining bout something sometimes I s’pose.

MILES

And you just the same.

JONAH

Ya. I sees what you sayings there. But I ain’t nones really complaining. Anyone can do anything for all I care. I just saying I ain’t none want no part of it.

MILES

Then why bring it up?

JONAH

Man, I don’t know. You like a cop or something?

MILES

Just curious.

JONAH

Course you is. All you is. All you folks always is. And ain’t just you black folks neither. All you folks that any of you folks curious bout me. Guess it got something to do with my dad being a nigger beater or something.

MILES

I imagine so.

JONAH

Not my fault he’s a racist prick. What can I do about it? A roaring drunk and a kid beating dick. Thats just what he is, you know. And I’d say I hate em but I don’t. I don’t. Not really. I should but I don’t. I love that stupid son of a bitch. Guess its cause I have to, right. Have to love your parents or whatever, right. No matter what. Thats another thing I don’t really get. Like, why do parents just get what you got, you knows. Like, woopee, they didn’t kill you, whats so great about that? I go around not killing people everyday. And you don’t none see nobodies loving me nothing. And its not like they have to none likes you none neither. Like sure, they loves you or whatever, but like, they hardly ever do. And I’m like, bitch, at least you got to get me, got to choose me, and still you ain’t happy? Like, bitch, what ever will makes you nones happy? Nothing probably. But we’re just supposed to love em and like em cus what, they got it on? Wow, real hard that is. Even I can do that. So I don’t know. I don’t get it. But I betters be getting then. Before dad nones starts beating again.

MILES

Why not just leave? Why not just go and tell somebody what he did?

JONAH

Told you ain’t I?

MILES

What good is that?

JONAH

None worth no doin. Ain’t nothing nobody can do worth much something. Just is how it is I suppose. Until I goods and get grown up I guess, then I’m gone for good.

MILES

Isn’t there anything I can do?

JONAH

Much as anybody else. But you won’t. Not yous nor nobodies. You alls the same in that sort of way. Says you do anything for anybodies but really just do nothings for nobodies. And thats alright. Thats okay. I’m just the same ways too. We all is in that sort of way. Guess thats what makes us us in that sort of way.

MILES

I’m sorry I couldn’t be of more use.

JONAH

Ain’t none expecting you too. Long you nones got a gun, I good as free, ain’t I?

Miles nods.

Jonah moves back to the car.

JONAH

Say, that beating pops says you getting, it none true?

Miles shakes his head.

JONAH

Figured. Ain’t none hurt a fly for real. Just big talk is all. Except for us kids. But I guess thats just some sort of compensation of his.

Jonah hops into the car, and drives away.

EXT. POOL - NIGHT

Miles walks somberly back to the pool, Andre sitting in subdued pain.

ANDRE

Any luck?

MILES

Nothing much. Just a kid mostly.

ANDRE

Nah. For real?

MILES

Probably just stole it or something.

ANDRE

Damn. That kid something else.

MILES

You okay?

ANDRE

Not dead yet. You?

Miles shrugs.

MILES

Rather be.

ANDRE

Ah cmon man. Not this again.

MILES

No. Maybe not. I don’t know...Seeing so much hurt in the world....It just doesn’t seem right.

ANDRE

Seems rather godless, doesn’t it?

Miles nods.

ANDRE

Well I’m sorry about your faith man. Had to go sometime.

MILES

Ya? What makes you so sure?

Andre shrugs.

ANDRE

Everyone’s does eventually, just a matter of time mostly.

MILES

Even priests?

ANDRE

Especially priests.

MILES

That one needs explaining.

ANDRE

Nah man, not really. But I’ll give it to you anyways. Look, its sort of like this. We all believe in something at some point, right, like Santa Claus or the Easter bunny or whatever. Everyone has something sometimes. And thats just fine or good or whatever. Just like childhood expectations or what have you. But eventually, well, eventually, you see things as they really are, you know, as they’ve always been. Priests especially. Who sees more evil than them? Cruelty and beating and frivolous cheating. Plagues and starvation and flesh eating diseases. Man, what kind of god is into that? No. No. Theres no way theres a god like that. Hell, even humans aren’t that bad. Even humans have some sort of decency. But a god? A good god at that? Man, forget that. I mean, maybe I could give it to you if like there was just some sort of snotty nosed brat of a god who just sat up there all day long laughing his ass off or whatever, that I could give. But cmon man, who wants to believe in that? A monster of a god who just messes with you cus he can. No. No. You couldn’t believe in that. How could you?

MILES

Then why keep going? Why keep lying? Why keep spouting all this nonsense about the good word of our lord and savior?

ANDRE

Its all about control man. All about the weak. All about whatever one man can do to the meek.

MILES

Surely some believe truly.

ANDRE

Sure. The stupid. The innocent. The ignorant. But theres never been nearly as many of those as everyone makes out there to be.

MILES

But they’re happy, are’t they? Isn’t that something?

ANDRE

Something, sure. Lots of something. But theres no reason that should be the only something. Theres lots of ways happy.

MILES

Wouldn’t a godless world mean a cruel one too?

ANDRE

Only if you believe it to be true. Only if you believe people to be evil and life to be cruel. If thats the case then yes. For that reason then maybe. But I don’t think thats true. I mean, theres a lot wrong with the world, there is, don’t get me wrong, but most of its just not true. Most of its just blind ignorance. Just what stupidity want us to do. But we’re just trying to make it through, you know?

MILES

So there is no evil?

ANDRE

Sure theres evil. Lots of evil. People do evil everyday. But no ones truly evil. Not really. No one does much of anything thinking its cruel. Its just the wrong intentions, is all. Everyone thinks they’re right, some are just wrong.

MILES

What good are intentions?

ANDRE

Well a lot I think. Everything for that matter. How else do you suppose we figure one from the other?

MILES

I think intentions are useless. I think really they’re quite pointless. I think intentions are just something we tell ourselves to make ourselves feel better. What we do is all we have. Not why we do it or to what end we do it, but only what we do. Killing is killing, no matter how righteous the justice.

ANDRE

Well what about a rapist then? A murderer? A terrorist? Surely giving them some peace in death isn’t so bad.

MILES

Sure, for you and me. But thats just a bit selfish, don’t you think? I mean, if there really is no god or whatever, you think damning them forever will be any better? You said it yourself, no ones truly evil, then why kill anyone ever? Why murder the murderer? Kill the killer? I may think the evil are evil, they’re crimes as cruel as they, but that doesn’t mean I think doing the same to them is anymore better.

ANDRE

Man, what else can we do? Just keep em in prison forever? Where they’ll be horrible and miserable and terrible forever.

Miles shrugs.

MILES

I didn’t say thats right either. What good is a life of no more than misery? But surely theres something better somewhere. A rehab or something. There has to be something.

ANDRE

But what about justice man? What about fairness and not? What about all those people who still need to pay what they already got?

MILES

And what good will that do? Condemning the guilty and reminding the plea? Torturing the innocent and not all just the same? None. Nothing. Not even a bit. It won’t do anything for anybody but create more hate. It won’t bring back the dead undead, nor the raped unraped. All it will do is make the uninvolved free. Not the murderer, not the murdered, just the already free. Thats all it will do. Just a way to make us petty thieves feel straight. Stealing the only thing anyone ever had. And thats what you call grace? Theft? No. I don’t think so.

ANDRE

What else then? How else then? How else do you suppose we dispose of the wrongs of the hate?

MILES

Accept it. Be okay with it. And just move on.

ANDRE

And just let them get away with it?

MILES

Thats not what I said. Thats not what I meant. Each must know what he did. Know what he said. But what good will punishment do at all in the end?

ANDRE

What then?

MILES

Truth. Honesty. Confrontation. Owning up to what one did. Seeking help where help is needed.

ANDRE

But you’re the one who said intentions never mattered. Why never bothered. So how then will you just fix everything without doing anything?

MILES

Not fix. No one can fix. Just understand. Understand how and when and stop it from happening again.

ANDRE

Without prison?

MILES

Without misery.

ANDRE

What then? Where then? Where will all these people go?

MILES

A place where they can learn. A place where they can get better. A place where they can go and learn and finally get better.

ANDRE

So like a reformatory then?

MILES

Something like that. Something other than this. Anything other thats nothing like this. What good will hate do but rear more hate?

ANDRE

Well I guess I’m with ya there. But I still think a good death is better than that.

MILES

Rather sentimental, don’t you think?

ANDRE

So I’m a romantic then.

Miles smiles.

EXT. BEACH - NIGHT

Tepid gloom withdraws from an early morning sky, casting a luminescent blue beyond the sea.

Tides grasp at sullen figures, sitting, staring, awaiting a morning sun.

A woman of a slight build but a full belly walks near the two with a nervous limp, and sits with unkempt anxiety.

So dulled by the nights events, the two hardly feign interest.

The woman, FANTINE, young, impoverished, pregnant, holds tight to her swollen belly, looking delicately out into the never ending sea.

FANTINE

I have to, you know. Theres no other way.

ANDRE

Have to what?

FANTINE

Kill her. Or him. I don’t really know. If they’re even really alive even.

ANDRE

You mean...

Andre looks down at her belly.

FANTINE

Its best this way.

ANDRE

Best how?

FANTINE

Best because I have to. Best because theres no other way. I mean, I already have three already. And can barely feed them as is. And my husband a drunk and I with no work, at least none worth no mentioning at least, though I went to school and everything just like everyone else. But how could I stay with a job and a baby and everything else just the same? I couldn’t just do everything. And I couldn’t just quit my job, I needed the money, and my baby, well, obviously. So thats what it was. Thats what it had to be. And everyone tells me to just go and get back and just do it again but for what? With what? Do they think I’m just made of some sort of money? I’m not. I’m not. And with three kids already and a father barely there, what else can I do? Dump him, sure. I could do that. But what good would that do? Kids with no father and I barely there? An income we can hardly afford already. I mean, its not like we don’t work for a living. I work two jobs sixty hours a week and still with my kids. But at minimum wage thats barely twenty a year. And if it were just me that would be one thing. That I could do. But with kids and a husband I really rather can’t. And when you count the car and the house and insurance and all that its really rather nothing really. I mean, its not like we spend much, we don’t spend any. Just food and water and shelter and all that. And sure we get food-stamps or whatever, but what good is that? Prisoners eat better than we do. And alcohol’s no cheap commodity neither. Not that I drink much. I don’t drink at all. But he does. He always has. And I get why he does. He lost his job, you know, a good job too. Well at least a pretty okay job for the most part, down at the factory. And now he’s out of work and he’s looking for more, he is, but with his record as it is, you know, stupid stuff like weed when he was a kid, and dropping out of school to keep his family from starving, well, what can he do? No one wants him. And those that do won’t even pay him what they should. Not even minimum mostly. Sure its illegal, but he is too, cus he’s one of those, you know? So what can he do? He drinks, cus he has to. And now, another mouth to feed too? I don’t know. I don’t know. I mean, its not me I’m worried about, or him or them for that matter, its the baby. The maybe. I mean, what kind of life can it live like this anyways? No one to watch and no one to love. Sure I could adopt but what good would that do? Thats where I grew up, you know, and you know what its like? I don’t think you do. Its misery, it is. I mean, sure, some kids get lucky with the right parents and stuff, but most are just stuck with what they got and its really not completely the parents fault entirely, they try, they do, but its hard, you know, especially with kids of their own already. Its sort of hostile I guess and sometimes some of em just use it to their advantage or whatever. With like money or whatever. Not like theres much and most don’t but some do and thats no good. So what good is that? All that goddamn misery. I mean, whats so great about life anyways? What exactly are we giving her? Our hunger, our pain, our misery? Who deserves that, let alone a little baby? No. No. I couldn’t. I can’t. Not again. Not ever again. And its not like we tried neither. We used protection and everything. But that kind of stuff adds up, you know, and birth control isn’t free no more either, and other ways are even more even. I mean, I know in some places they give away free stuff and stuff but not really so much around here so much, not really ever around here. I could barely find a place as is hardly. Had to drive all the way out here from another state entirely just to find this one as is. And it doesn’t seem so great neither. But what else can I do? How else could I do it? Its not like I can just afford the time off really. Just today really. Thats all. There and back. Real quick. And I couldn’t do it any sooner cus I didn’t know any sooner, you know. How could I till now? Its not like I could go and see a doctor or anything. I mean, medicare’s fine and all that but not really and it doesn’t really work so well neither. I kind of just had to figure it out for myself with that little test or whatever. And now I’m here on my way there, almost there actually, just across the way mostly. I just had to have a little moment to think it over or whatever, you know. Its not easy to just go and do. People think people just do it to do it, but they don’t. They don’t. Nobody does. Its not easy for me or for anybody for that matter. But I have to. I have to. What else can I do? So I can and I will as soon as I get up the nerve to.

ANDRE

How far along are you?

FANTINE

Not really that much really. Like I said before, I came as soon as I could, but it takes a while to figure all that stuff out and stuff. And plus I had to take a whole day off work and figure with my kids and all that and it was a whole thing really so not too long really, maybe like twelve or fourteen weeks or so maybe, which I know isn’t so legal way back home maybe but I think its legal here I think but I really don’t know. I hope so. I really do. I don’t know what else to do.

MILES

If not?

FANTINE

Well...then...I’ll...I’ll...I’ll figure it out, thats what I’ll do. But theres no reason to think the unknown, you know. If it can’t, it won’t, but we don’t know that for sure.

ANDRE

What about your husband?

FANTINE

What about him?

ANDRE

Does he know?

FANTINE

Oh sure, mostly, he does. I mean, we talked about it, you know. He’s not too enthused, you know, with the whole choice thing or whatever, but I don’t know, its my body, right? My baby. I mean, its not like he’s necessarily against it or anything, he agrees for the most part. Just the adoption thing is more his path, you know. But I guess thats just part of his religion I guess. Plus, he never had it like I did, you know. His dad was a doctor before he came here. Then, well, you know, had to go quick and never got citizenship and of course my husband was just a kid but still an illegal, you know. I mean, he tried that one thing with the dreaming and all that but it sounds like its not really working out so well right now so we’ll see. I don’t know. But when I told him the government had to be involved in the whole adoption thing or whatever he was a little less for it. So he’s not exactly for it, but he’s not much against it either. So I don’t know. I guess I just have to wait and see I guess.

MILES

To wait is to wail. The eternal suffering of every being.

ANDRE

Man, don’t listen to him, he doesn’t know what he’s saying. He’s delirious, thats all. Long night.

Fantine smiles and nods.

FANTINE

The night is longest for the frightened.

ANDRE

Frightened? Man you joking if you think I’m frightened!

FANTINE

Not you. Him.

Fantine looks over to Miles, who stares at the sea.

ANDRE

Miles?

Miles blank face deceives no one.

ANDRE

You okay?

Fantine stands to her feet.

FANTINE

Its better if I go. I’ve my own troubles already. Better to not trouble you with anymore than necessary.

ANDRE

You gonna be okay?

Fantine shrugs.

FANTINE

Have to.

Andre nods absently.

ANDRE

Well, good luck then.

Fantine nods to Miles.

FANTINE

You too.

Fantine walks off the beach and up the hill towards Miles’ house.

Miles stands, feet pulled towards the climbing water.

MILES

I pity her.

ANDRE

She pity’s you.

MILES

Thats why I do.

ANDRE

Whats that supposed to mean?

Miles gives a sad smile.

MILES

Just what it does. What good will her pity do?

ANDRE

Man, aren’t you tired of it yet? All this acting and pretending and never really being. Man, you talking like you know something but you don’t know nothing more than nobody.

MILES

Maybe thats true.

ANDRE

Man, course its true. You’re just talking like you’re smarter than you ever really were. As if by hanging some phrases you can somehow go and get hanged. Man, you think suicide’s any good? You think you’re any noble? Man, you’re just selfish, thats all. Thats all this is. Killing yourself. You’re not thinking about anybody else. You’re just thinking about yourself. What do you even got to be so glum about? Huh? You got food. Water. Shelter. People who love you. People to love. What do you want that you don’t already got?

MILES

Nothing.

ANDRE

Then get over it man.

MILES

I can’t.

ANDRE

And why the hell not?

MILES

Because theres nothing to get over. If I was just miserable I would just stop being miserable. Furious, the same. If I just felt something, anything, I would just stop feeling that something and feel something else. But I don’t feel anything. Nothing at all. Its like watching a movie already halfway through. You don’t know whats going on and you don’t really care about anyone involved. You want to. You do. But whats the point? The movie just ends just the same anyways, whether you love it or not. Nothing changes. Nothing at all. Just your reaction, thats all, and thats not worth anything to anybody. So why even try in the first place? Why even do anything ever? Everything’s just gonna end up the same way anyways.

ANDRE

Man, you don’t mean that.

MILES

Maybe I don’t. Maybe I don’t mean anything I say. But what good are words without any meaning? I don’t know. I don’t know. I wish I could tell you I could just feel better, I could just be better. But I can’t. I can’t. Believe you me, I’ve tried quite a bit, but turns out that doesn’t really work so well so much for me. Not even a bit. Kind of just more of just the same and nothing else really. Worse actually sometimes. But I guess thats what I get for just being me. For just doing nothing about anything. For just watching and wandering and never really being. I mean, what exactly did I expect, never doing anything worth doing. Sure I got my art for whatever thats worth but what good is that? Just some arbitrary colors mostly. What good does that do anybody? Its not like I’m saving lives or families or anything. Not even animals even. Just profiting off the stupidity of others. And I’m just supposed to be happy about that? I don’t know. Maybe. Maybe thats all life is. Being stupidly happy. I mean, whats really wrong with all that in the end? Whats any of this worth if you’re just not happy? Is it better to be in the wallows of poverty and still very happy, or the luxury of wealth and have nothing but misery? I don’t know. I don’t know. Both seem rather miserable to me. Of course, thats all just a false dichotomy. I know that, I get that, but I just can’t seem to be happy. Or sad. Or anything for that matter. Its like I’m just numb, you know, and I just don’t feel anything. I understand what it means to be happy. Like, from a logical standpoint, I get it. I do. And I remember it kind of sort of. But when I watch it again, play it back in my mind or whatever, its just like, I don’t know, watching someone else I guess. Theres no joy or nostalgia or anything for that matter. Just the memory. Thats all. And I want to feel something. I want to feel anything. I try. I do. But nothing comes. Nothing ever does. Nothing but pain. But not like a misery pain. Just gruesome, horrific pain. And thats no good neither. So it just seems to me like maybe sometimes it might just be better to just not, you know. To just stop, I guess. I don’t know. I don’t know. I wish I at least made some sort of sense to somebody anyways. I wish anything I said made any sort of sense to anybody, but it seems to me like nothing does much of anything. It seems to me like all I’m doing is talking just to talk.

ANDRE

Don’t say that man. You can’t think like that. Thats what gets people killed. Thinking they’re alone when they’re really rather not. I’m here for you man. Thats what I’m here for.

MILES

But what good is hearing when you never really listen? I’m not worth anything Andre. I never have been. I’m a screw up who just got lucky. I’ve never done anything worth doing. I never will. And so what if I did? So what if I do? So what if I changed a life or two or ten or even the world even? Its just the world. Not even a big world even. Just a tiny minuscule dot upon the monstrosity of the universe. And not even the only universe neither, just one in an infinite. So whats the point of even trying? Whats the point of even doing? Surviving to survive just to help others survive. So what? So we can all just die just the same anyways? Man, we’re all gonna die. Each and every one of us. And us as a species too. Its inevitable. Its what we do. Its that cruel fate God decided thats just what we have to do. So why wait for the inevitable? Why wait for what will already happen? Why not just go and do and get it over with then? So at least it can be done. At least it can be over.

ANDRE

Cus it ain’t none about none of that man. Sure we’re all gonna die. But so what? So is the sun. So is the earth. But that doesn’t stop the sun from rising, the earth from spinning. Nor the trees from breathing, nor the snails from crawling. Man, so what if we’re all gonna die? So what? What does that have to do with anything? That doesn’t mean we have to die now. We have to die soon. We don’t even have to die then. And whats with all this meaning and something? Man, nothings gotta mean anything if you really don’t want it to. Maybe life just exists to exists, thats all.

Miles smiles sadly.

MILES

Then whats the point of even doing anything?

ANDRE

Thats just it man! There is no point. Don’t you get it, life’s just there to be there, thats all. No rhyme. No reason. No nothing.

MILES

Then why go on?

ANDRE

Because thats what you do man.

MILES

You maybe. Most probably. But not me. Not anymore. I can’t just live simply to live.

ANDRE

Then live for life man. Live for love! Live for the sun and the trees and the moon and the earth. Live for me and my friends and your friends and the world. Live for everything. Live for anything. Just live for something man. If thats what you gotta do then just do that man.

MILES

I don’t want something. I don’t want anything. I’m just tired, thats all. I just want to sleep for a good long while.

ANDRE

Then sleep man! Right here on the beach! No ones stopping you from sleeping right here on the beach.

MILES

Not that kind of sleep.

Andre stares in furious horror.

ANDRE

So thats it then? After all this? Just nothing worth anything? Not even me? Just leaving cus you can? Without any consideration for anyone whatsoever?

MILES

I’ve considered.

ANDRE

And?

MILES

I’m not worth the worry.

ANDRE

Man, forget it! Do whatever the hell you want! I’m done trying to do shit for you! You wanna kill yourself? Go right ahead. What shit should I care? Theres plenty of other people out there! Man, fuck you! I hope there is a god. I hope there is a hell. Cus I sure as hell wanna rub it in your face when I see you there.

Andre walks away, up the hill.

Miles stands, waves grasping at his feet.

Miles pulls a gun from his pocket, contemplating.

Miles walks out into the sea, gun in hand.

Miles pulls the gun close, head to head.

The pulling of a trigger.

A slight click.

Nothing.

FADE OUT: