For Now

“An episodic memory of one sighted view of love and regaining hope within the family. Is it possible Marisa will have her new beginnings with a mysterious guy or cut her ties completely?”

Chapter 1 Summer

You may read her through her obvious taciturn and reticence when she was surrounded by people ,but her dark eyes have a never ending urge to love someone which was concealed by that murkiest brown iris.She might be called as “dead” in easy terms as she rarely squeezed out her admiration to someone, however only her heart knew how much it beat for that individual she headed for.

That experience she never told, because she was eloquence enough to say, “it was my perspective of seeing it”; this tale began at the season of Summer, in a wedding series of her relative. Being a part of a large family, she get to introduce herself to various members who turned out to be closely aligned.During her gloomy period which she was aware of, however fend to destruct her slowly out of her consciousness, miraculously it paused like a rock fall blocked a journey taken in highway; the moment she saw him.

The man sat there like a ruler in a middle of families and were amused by his flamboyant personality and jokes. She was only aware of him as a notorious loquacious person, whom everyone were afraid to argue with. He is a man known for his rational approaches ,success, and bluntness which scare people at times when it comes to discussion.

The lass sat on a Victorian chair which was apparently near to where he sat. He asked her about her current activities and well being publicly ,which she answered in resonant voice. After passing few jokes to the small crowd ,he scratched his head and said “I made a wrong impression”. Whole crowd burst into laughter and knew it was referring to this newly met girl, and every next moment she couldn’t stop her giggle and shyness around him. This was time her succumbed self woke into spring.

Chapter 2 Autumn

It was unfortunate for her that her happiness was for short time, the comfort she felt around him and exchanging no words was all she experienced, also spending time with his sister ,Jade.An year distant gave her stability and yearning to meet that handsome man again. At next Autumn span, she wasn’t excited to meet him after being emotionally scorn by her friend for months made her numb to meet-up, or revive love again.She finally got cornered at some point of her life where she had no choice just to meet him, a girl with ethics forth to this path.

After an hour of shopping, she dropped Jade to her brother however she could not get see him again as he was away for his work purposes.

Few days later, Jade acceded her for sleepover at the house. In afternoon, she found herself knocking at the gate, however there was not even a single sound of pulse nearby. She called one of her relatives for the door to be opened, after ten minutes she found Jade on phone talking to her brother who seemed to show concern about her waiting outside under scorching heat . Not even an hour both adorable lasses had lunch and fasten asleep. Hastily the man barged in the house with his loud and clear voice asking about the happenings in room, the moment he entered where he found her curled on a single sofa in deep sleep whilst her crimson shawl covering her hips that emphasis her petite curves. He stealthily took few steps back and exited the room.

Meanwhile, after a quick bathe he came back to the room along his towel wrapped around his torso covering till his knees ,and sneaked in the room to wake her up with comment “how long are you going to sleep?we have to go to meet a relative”. The moment she snapped out from her nap ,the first glimpse she had was at his bare wide chest and shoulders that were broad and toned. He followed where her eyes went and shifted from all joy to a reticence silence, while she was lying on the mustard couch in same position defining her curves and her arm covering up her mouth, yet displaying her ravishing eyes.

“Get ready you both” in a swift tone he said and went off to dress up.After she and Jade fresh up from their naps where Jade went to lavatory, while she went downstairs and played with their pet, “Kiwi the kitty”. She was all smiling while the cat was busy cuddling her knee as she lunged down, and for a second her sight went away from cat to the room where she found him looking at her,she focused on his mouth to see if he smirked or not; he was difficult to read, she bound up and approached to hallway while closing the door,however Kiwi meowed that grabbed her attention again. She squat down and meowed back, yet again she went over the shoulder to catch his glimpse ,she eyed him for a bit longer this time and smirked, while trying her effort to read that man expression; which broke between confusion or a smirk,yet doubtful which one was on his face.

She opened the car door for her beloved relatives and made sure they seated well.Her eyes went up where she saw him holding the left door for her and waiting for her to be seated. She took a bit long with the relatives,as she looked away he was gone and been seated at the front,so she went to her left side and got in the vehicle. During the travel, he asked her about places for arcades for Jade, furthermore another period passed with jokes and laughter. At the time of meeting their newly wedded relative, where he caught her usually smiling in joy mostly when she glance at him. Luckily for her, he paused twice and stare at her smile. Glances exchanged, but no words. She could feel where his eyes went from her poised posture to her pale hands, till her actions comforting her family. In evening, after a house tour, she found him against the wall outside the room they sat; that gave a perception of waiting for their arrival, she and her other family friends forth to the room while a short gaze in each other’s eyes. She turned away and went to the room with them.

On the way for leave, she stood in front of him where he faced her back as his view. The moment she left he stopped her with few words, “ take care of Jade while I am away”. For her, it was the last thing she could have assumed that he can trust someone, not even his close ones ever thought of. She went home with Jade and spend a good quality sister like time together. The next day,Jade complained her not going to arcades.

At afternoon, when he came back to the house, he went straight to her and asked about how her night at this place. Few times, he came to her and questioned her current state of wellness in this house. She was charmed by his hospitality, and when he came again, he stared at her sharp pouty lips as she was about to say something. She murmured for second ,but end up having courage to request him for allowance of arcade for his youngster. Which was approved by him and prolong his gaze over her while resting his palm on his chin against the same Victorian chair she sat.

Jade rushed for changing from her pyjamas and collecting her accessories, while he taunted her twice “don’t go anywhere else”. Finally she roused to him “ we will jump off from the car” with a smirk and looked away, he gave a blank perception from his look and turned his back. The house went crowded with babels, but his glances at her did not stop, so she counted the moments of his gaze ; as she was at stairway on the way to the floor, and till the time she spend wandering near to the room he stood and watched her as he caught gold by his eyes from falling, this is how he looked at her each time she appeared in that duration before leaving home.

Jade came back with a wide smile and won a colossal amount of lottery .

He questioned her about her education which she hesitated to answer, but giggled instead to dodge him due to the fact she wasn’t aware of him either being sarcastic or not, that made him response in strict tone “I am serious”. She gulped and responded. Shortly every few seconds she felt like being looped over by someone.

She stood up after looking at the clock and greet families goodbyes, she felt being watched that made her cheeks burned crimson, along with her the rest of people walked each other out to the door. However, she could not keep up with them due to some reasons. She turned around and saw him sat at the corner like a king waiting for another hunt, he had his brown eyes all aimed at her and reading every move of her. He whispered, she looked around the vacant room with no sound. She pinched herself to follow him; her palm sweated out by a strong grip of her black leather bag, with a blank expression , but aware of how unpredictable he could be. She bound at the front, he commanded at strict tone “give me your hand”.Despite the fact that aroused her, she obeyed and gave what he asked. He handed over a simple xenium, “buy whatever you want”.

Her heart never satisfies by materialism, so she encountered him and gave the gift back. He held her wrist firmly to prevent from her approach ,she was about to switch the object to another hand, however that also got gripped vigorously. She tried to twist herself out, he juggled to grab both of her thin arms as she was about to get hurt from throwing herself to the table unconsciously. Good for her, he was powerful enough to stop that elegant young adult from fall, yet made her approach unsuccessful. She trace his small features and merry smile that melts her heart every time she looked at him. Back of her head she was willing snog him passionately.

The pair got interrupted by Jade, she held her hand for a firm hand shake and good bye. In response he gave his hand. Hands releasing from grips, and on their final touch before walking away she rubbed his fingers by her tips, passionately and slowly while each step she made backwards for her exit. She walked away, and his hand remained extended while being seated.

On the way home, she texted her gratefulness to him for a good time and trusting her for securing his belongings, and hoping to grow this relations.

Chapter 3 Unfilled

The text gave a response after few days and one word. Dictating to continue to actions. She messaged him back of his well-being which he responded after days later. She patiently waited and continued the conversation about current activities,then again he responded late but instead of answering the question he asked about her. She immediately replied about her status. She asked about his situation. Few days later, she found the message on read,she went from harvest feelings to a dead plant in seconds as he did not responded. She messaged him again.Each day she convey a message with affection and positivity.

Whole month passed by,he responded asking about her circumstances instead. She answered immediately,and again each day her love grew more along with her messages to him. After two months without any feedback,she was terrified whether if he was bothered by her. She text him an apology, fortunately a week later he asked about her again. Her predictable manner continued, with cherish she mailed him daily, but nothing in return.

Another month spend in the same schedule and no response. Her nights spend in tears while her days spend in fears. She felt on one’s jack each day and in every hour, her solitary grew to suppress her activities than just sobbing.

All the love she gave was loathe?

Chapter 4 Do You Still Care Tonight?

Days passed apathetically, but good for her she summoned her hope each time with another positive reason whilst the messages prolonged.

In a middle of night , she had an instinct of being conscience towards him. She put a lot of effort to avoid the behaviour of mailing about his wellness, unfortunately she could not manage and intend to do so. Yet again ,he asked about her relative this time which made her felt left out.

Few days later, she found herself in a wedding ceremony ; the moment she entered in the house she fully planned to ignore him, as he was predictable for her. Sneaking at her when she made an entrance whilst laid back in chair and crossed arms. Publicly he called her out while remained seated ,she turned her attention to greeting guest, his eyes were all over that petite woman. As she got off from them, he called her out again and without any choice she had to walk towards him. He rapidly questioned her condition and activities, she switched to person beside him and greet in serious tone.

He tried to catch her by throwing questions to her, however her response was one nod and left the area. She looked over the shoulder, and saw him looking fixedly at her. Meanwhile, he walked in and stood in front of her path. She was about to leave the hallway to lavatory, while glimpsed at the areas where she could easily escape. Unfortunately, he was reading her already and the moment she forth a step to her right to dodge him, he leaned himself slightly on her narrow way. She was gapped, along her eyes were wide open while muffled when her shoulder hit against the wall, but seemed like he did not moved. He looked at her stunned face and requested her to bring his bag. She brought the object and handed to without any eye contact. He held the handle closely that touched their fingers, while she felt being looped over again. She glance up to his face and his eyes went down like it never happened and walked away.

Her heart remained broken ,but she answered about her relative’s health. He did not respond. She questioned about his health, and no feedback came, however across the hallway she could see him holding his device.

All day long she was exhausted yet alone. It was about time when she decided to go home with her family. All gathered for farewell greetings, he stood up shook hands and nodded to guests. When he walked towards her, where she decided just to give her hand for firm handshake and leave, however it got neglected by him as she lift up her hand. He fend to another guest for best wishes. Meanwhile, he was tracing her movements ,as the crowd went forward she prolonged with them. Her heels turned to her front view and tend to walk out, whilst people got hooked in blaring as they reach the main exit.

All the way out of the room, however she felt a strong pull towards the back, and found her slim figure attached to a middle aged frame. He wrapped his arm around her when no one was watching, and rested her head on his shoulders along with her long arm wrapped around his waist and stroking his back gently. As she was alert of one thing, that behaviour was never seen by any of his close allies before, neither had an illusion of it.

People turned around to find her, where she felt unarmed. Both separately decided to prolong with them. She waited outside at the gate and caught him staring at her. She flipped her ponytail like it was not a big deal. She walked in again to him for another smooth touch, however he got into a conversation related to his work.

Heart filled with butterflies, and she went home to text him. The journey continued of her never ending powerful awe messages whilst his response never came.

Her emotional rollercoaster is about to experience a shuttle loop and she was acknowledged of it’s forming.

Chapter 5 Junction

All women of the house where afraid of him as his never ending plainspoken trait and rigidity, but that was the characteristic she adored from bottom of her heart.

For three months she kept her habit of conveying passional messages to him ,and no response neither any hint of whether he read them or not. She shared him each thoughts of her; from missing him, to visiting places that were nostalgic of their last moment, and bursting inevitable cherish and affection to him that dictates she will always be there for him, mostly.

The love was one sided, she grew towards exhaustion and hopeless state. Months and months the condition worsen that grabbed her initial state of mind, as a distant and cold behaviour. She could not hold her affection for long which shifted to hateful daydream, yet her remorse grew all over her mind with expectation that he loathe her.

No communication from her foresee beloved. Her nights were spend in dripping tears before going to bed, even when she rouse in late evening. In afternoon she ponder about how much renegade she felt from him. Her energy went compressed, and occasionally sensed her heart beats to fast for him, or felt like being stifle when she ever consider of losing him.

She sweats out and undergoes to suffocation in every text she created, but no response; she never been touched by abandonment this brutally. Her remarkable feature were dissolved into deep sadness, and starve to sleep at night. She binged in confectioners and caffeine. She aroused by the touch of being hated and toss out, yet innovating dramatic scenarios in her head that mauls their spark, and at times it went heavily sensual.

Each day she buried her misery and aloofness in front her relatives with a weak smile. Her shell of patience cracked hard where could no longer resist, she messaged him of her genuine sensation but with a truth “ I am in love you”,with an apology. There was no response to the habitant. She felt in sorrow yet relief, but no where push throw her sadness. She dwelled her days being vacant while her heart evacuated her interest for her surroundings.

Her mind lethargically switching to be in vibrant and hopeful. She instigated to desire small things happening in her life, but again she crashed down each time when she remembered him. Her mind danced between tragedy and hope for days, but no idea which path to cross. Her mind was like a junction, but specially when she got to know two things; he might flew back to that abode within a month, however this might be the last crossover as his brood will not dwell in that abode for eternity. The future holds what if he comes back.

She missed every moment of his existence with him until she heard a cadence of words. “Often I get exhausted. I will be better than before, despite every text of yours ignored. I swear, always I will care. Leave me, it’s never easy. I had a lifetime of being alone. When it gets heavy, I will never let you be alone.I swear, I always care”.

On her delightful green sheet, she could not stop her tears and redness in her eyes. She sniffs and mournfully cry again. She messaged him about missing his presence. Her emotions danced for weeks yet she got disgusted by herself for being this vulnerable.

Chapter 6 March

Even before his arrival,there was major twist in her feelings,but that seemed permanent. The time all her emotions gathered and made her shuffle her mind to be more vulnerable made her went all amiable to him,but he remained silent.

However,in her experiences being pleasant was her biggest folly. Despite the fact she gave her heart out each and every time,but when you do not follow their rules,nobody march with you to support you.

His perspective seemed obvious,something pinched him that made the brooding individual to see her talkative about him in public,unfortunately that was not the reality. She remained silent. He immediately cut her out of his life,whilst forgetting all the golden period she received from him,and the moments that lift her smile. He revived someone ; a hollow heart that was filled with butterflies and colours in her life,yet she understood that part of the man who everyone scratched him off the list,because of that specific trait.

As she found out, she did not cry,but her heart had no where to go. Instead a huge rock stomped and blocked every possible healthy situation she imagined with him. Her burden grew to inability to pour out glamour and where she suffocates the most,every year she crashed down on floor and sobering continues for weeks. She became close and cold,but inside her heart wants to love. She was born to love not to rage.

She watches everyone in love and affection,however she screams on the inside and stays isolated. She was chapping again.

Her chest was pounding,she could not ponder that fact that man will be in another forgotten person list,soon. She was used to of it,but she was frightened as she genuinely admired him, deeply.

Now will she be ready for another person to continue this nightmare