Not Sorry

How do I keep choosing the wrong one?

Use to think it was because of my father...

Had this part of me that wanted to be loved...

Had this part of me that wanted to be healed...

Had this part of me that needed to be needed...

Couldn't see that love made you vulnerable...

My father told me that these niggas wasn't shit

Guess I know why he made me promise...

Not to get married until he came home...

I hated him for leaving me....

I filled that hate with sex....

My father told me to stand for something...

He told me to focus....

I couldn't see what he meant...

But then again it all hit me...

It seemed he already knew what I was thinking

Before I even opened my mouth...

He seemed like he knew what I was feeling before I even told him...

I could see in his eyes that he loved me...

I mean genuinely loved me...

A feeling I've never felt before in any man...

Changed a lot in me...

Because for once in my life

Somebody was there to hold me down...

The pain seemed to hurt less...

The heart break seemed to build my character...

Life was falling in place

I just needed to position myself to catch

All of my blessings...

I had to accept the men in my life for what they were worth.

They all collectively taught me that I was vulnerable

And once I realized that was who I was...

I vowed to never settle

for less than what I was worth...

Family is what matters...

Because at the end of it all

You can't change family...

But you can replace objects of desire...

I was never weak...

I just never believed in my own strength...

I had to take back my heart

I had to take back my power

I had to take back

all the things I lost along the way...

Without feeling sorry.

Because In life we are NOT sorry...

Just sorry we got caught.