Love (And Hate) Island

I’m going to talk about a dreadful TV show that seems to have taken off exponentially over the past few years.

The grotesque abomination that is LOVE ISLAND. Admittedly, I hadn’t seen any episodes of the intellectually taxing programme, so I checked out a couple of episodes on Netflix.

Lord have mercy! I cannot believe that this stinking pile of dogshit is currently TV gold. It’s unfathomable how this wretched excuse for entertainment has garnered such popularity. Both genders are equally appalling in their un-enlightened attitudes and as expected the narcissistic quotient is off the scale. Collectively, the lot of them could easily out-Kanye, Kanye...

Seriously though, this is really quite disturbing. How have we sunk this low? What does this say about us? Listening to the guys talk, you’d think they’d never heard of Women’s Rights. Banter flies about regarding how many ‘birds’ they’ve ‘smashed’, how much money they earn, how they love a luxury lifestyle, how many celebrities they’ve mingled with etc...They talk about women like pieces of trash to be used and discarded at will. The regression of emotional maturity is strong amongst these Neanderthals... Safe to say that the late Stephen Hawking won’t have to relinquish his crown in the foreseeable future!

The girls are sadly just as tragically moronic. The air inside their feebly brained heads could quite easily fill their balloon tits and still have an oxygen tank left over for someone with chronic emphysema. Nothing is genuine, nothing has any substance whatsoever and everything is 100% fake. Teeth, lips, hair, boobs, nothing is immune from the surgeon’s scalpel. Sad, very sad and depressing indeed. Is this what we’ve amounted to? Young, easily influenced men and women thinking that looks, casual sex, money and a lavish lifestyle is are only things to aspire to? Looking good on Instagram is way more important than being a decent human being who gives back to society by contributing positively.

The really scary thing is that kids are watching this garbage, and obviously, they are extremely impressionable at such a young age. The fallout from this is being felt now within society. You can’t go anywhere these days without chancing upon young people either caked in makeup, (or should that be fakeup?) whilst taking vacuous ‘Selfies’. As for the guys, the only acceptable image appears to be that of a steroided and tattooed Incredible Hulk, (swap the green for Ronseal mahogany paint though...) Yuck!

I’ve written before how I fear for Generation Y and this morally repulsive show does nothing to quell my concerns. Don’t get me wrong, I’m no prude but honestly, we should be engaging people to have opinions on much more important things rather than who their next conquest is? The banality of discourse within the villa is mind-numbingly boring. When I was young, (yeah about 50 years ago) I was more concerned with Greenpeace issues and when the next Suede album was coming out. Not that I had young men forming a disorderly queue around the block though...opportunity would’ve been a fine thing! #ForeverAlone

Also, what’s the deal with that old slag Caroline Flack? Is she still pretending to be in her 20’s by acting cutesy whilst attempting to stay relevant by shagging the latest male reality star? I’m no mystic but I reckon she’ll be kissing goodbye to that fame chasing twat from last year’s Apprentice pretty soon.

Don’t worry Flackers, I’m sure that there’ll be a ‘barely legal’ boyband member in this year’s X Factor for you to get your claws into.

Oh, and I’ll keep quiet about how you’re borderline menopausal...I know the struggle is real...